赫伯特·加里森

赫伯特·加里森
角色信息
英文原名	Herbert Garrison
台湾译名	葛屁老师
香港译名	史Sir
化身或别称	珍妮特·加里森（Janet Garrison） 巨型灌肠器
性别	男（第1-8季，12季至今） 女（9-12季）
头发	金色(原先为灰色)
年龄	41
职业	现任美国总统（20季至今） 前四年级教师（7-19季） 前幼儿园教师（4-6季） 前三年级教师（1-3季）
信仰	罗马天主教（曾信仰过无神论）
配音	特雷·帕克
台湾配音	李香生
亲属
父亲	老加里森先生
母亲	老加里森太太
出场
首次出场	卡特曼的肛门探针

赫伯特·加里森，在变性后也叫珍妮特·加里森，是美利坚合众国第45任即现任总统，他于2017年1月20日宣誓就职。他曾是南方公园小学的四年级教师，但后来参加了总统竞选。他登场于第一季的"卡特曼的肛门探针"中并由特雷·帕克配音。

加里森在前8季都是男性，但在"加里森老师变性记"中变成女性，随后在"卡特曼老师"中又通过基因技术重新变回男性。

他在第十九季宣布参加总统竞选并最终获得了共和党提名。在第二十季中他成功当选为美国总统。

前方施工!!! 此页面正在更新中，请耐心等待

背景

赫伯特·加里森从小在阿肯色州长大而许多问题也在这一阶段萌芽。年轻的加里森已经显示出了他的同性恋倾向——他认为父亲不爱他因为父亲从未强奸过自己。加里森懂得许多关于性侵儿童的知识，还视之为对孩子们的爱而非骚扰犯罪。他曾在大学里获得过机械工程学位。但不知何时及为何，缺乏相关学科知识的他成为了南方公园小学的教师而不是一位工程师。

他曾因欲图强奸想与大人交朋友的埃里克·卡特曼而被逮捕。他在释放后被学校开除了，于是便投入到了小说创作中。在遭受自己的作品被定性为“同性恋小说”的刺激下，加里森躲进了山顶的洞穴中并再也不出来了。当乔克森迪克老师找到他来请教管理课堂的方法时，加里森意识到自己必须承认自己是同性恋的事实。随后他决定回到学校并成为了幼儿园老师。

在乔克森迪克老师去世后，加里森晋升为四年级教师并重新接管了原来的班级，与此同时他开始与一个叫奴隶先生的男人交往。在"亡命宽容营"中，加里森利用奴隶先生来试图让自己因“同性恋”而被开除，这样他就能控告学校赔偿他一百万美元。但事与愿违，他们最后因歧视自己的性取向而被送到了宽容营。在"加里森老师变性记"中，加里森认为自己并不是同性恋而是一个被困在男人身体里的女人，因此他通过变性手术成为了女人并改名为“珍妮特·加里森”。这种行为也使只喜欢与男人做爱的奴隶先生和她分手了。而加里森也成为了恐同者并恢复了他对同性恋的最初观念。加里森对自己的性生活十分不检点，她声称曾让一群卡车司机在卡车里“做”她。

在她意识到自己永远不会有经期也无法怀孕时，加里森意识到了她并不是真正意义上的女人，但现在想重置变性手术带来的改变也为时已晚，而她也接受了自己的身份。当她听说了奴隶先生和大基佬阿尔打算结婚时，她尝试通过让斯坦·马什和凯尔·布罗夫洛夫斯基同时照顾一颗蛋的方式来证明同性恋是不负责任的父母，并不具有照顾和养育后代的能力。他认为这颗蛋一定会碎，并在发觉二人并没有打碎它之后，想办法将其毁掉。这颗蛋在结局时依旧完好无损，这使得奴隶先生和大基佬阿尔的婚姻得以完成。加里森在“无神论的未来·一”中拒绝接受并教述进化论，学校高层雇佣了理查德·道金斯取代了他的位置。两名教师之间冲突频发，但道金斯和她展开了一段恋人关系，并说服了加里森放弃自己的宗教信仰，和他一样成为一名无神论者。道金对无神论的观点和加里森的“主张声明”结合起来，正常来讲会最终导致全世界接受无神论的观点。但这条时间线在“无神论的未来·十二”中因为埃里克·卡特曼的干预（对道金斯揭露了加里森是个变性人的事实）改变，导致两人关系破裂，未来格局也因此发生变化。

加里森在进入“蕾丝波”女同酒吧后性取向再次发生变化，并最终和另一名女同“艾莉森”发生了关系。她很快适应了自己女同的性取向，并开始捍卫女同权利和蕾丝波酒吧，也是在这里她再次成为了同性恋。在“卡特曼老师”中，她在看完奥普拉·温弗莉的电视节目后发觉自己的变性手术是个严重错误。她花费重金在一只小白鼠身上重新培植了自己的阴茎，并在移植后变回了男人。他的性取向在之后并不明朗，因为他也在变性时和女性发生过关系。在“娘炮”中，卡特曼要求使用女厕，因为他声称自己是变性人（卡特曼管自己叫做“变性淫”），加里森因为身为变性人，劝诫维多利亚校长暂时同意卡特曼的提议，以避免可能被挑大的丑闻。

在“我的国家在何处？”中，他开始反对国家中的非法加拿大移民，这导致他被南方公园小学中开除。他在之后展开了“把他们全都操死”运动，并且尝试在两国之间建造城墙以控制边境。但他发现了加拿大总统也在做同样的事来阻挡美国人。他潜入进加拿大，并且真正意义上的“操死”加拿大的总统，这使得反向移民潮出现，大部分加拿大移民也回到了自己的国家。他随后宣布了自己将会参与总统竞选。在“软文”中，他在辩论会上声称应该把所有入境的利比亚难民全部操死，因为他认为这些难民都是恐怖组织的成员。同时跟希拉里·克林顿比起来，他显然拥有更多的支持者。他在之后与凯瑟琳·詹纳和维多利亚校长一起回到了南方公园，以组织广告的阴谋。

在第二十季中，加里森依旧在竞选总统中遥遥领先，但发现自己并没有任何对自己总统日程的实质规划，他尝试通过在演奏国旗时坐立而不起立的方式尝试糟蹋自己的选票，但重启后的国歌允许美国公民坐立，站立，甚至跪立。他又尝试在公共场合做出对女性有性别歧视的发言和立场，这导致一群愤怒的选民向他索要答案，并对他展开追杀。当他发现自己在不停获得支持的原因是因为回忆莓时，他尝试和兰迪·马什一起摧毁它们，但并没成功。相反的，在自己吃下一颗回忆莓后，他继续参加竞选并胜出。

班级

作为一名三年级和四年级的教师，赫伯特·加里森是一名非常不称职的老师。他的学生更愿意彼此聊闲，而不是听他上课。虽然他偶尔也因此惩罚学生，比方说他在“疯狂俱乐部”中强迫斯坦·马什在全班面前朗读贝蓓·斯蒂文斯传给他的尴尬私密纸条。但他的学生似乎并不吸取教训，并不停重复错误。

值得注意的是，他的学生似乎也对他的情况毫不关心。在“小矮人”中，他宣布自学校正在考虑炒他的鱿鱼因为他并不教述实时事件，但他的学生不为所动。在“隆鼻手术”中，凯尔·布罗夫洛夫斯基甚至在代课老师要求学生要像尊敬主任老师一样尊敬她时，告诉她学生们对加里森没有丝毫尊敬。

即使如此，斯坦，凯尔，和温蒂依旧在“要你肥4000”中去精神中心探望了他，并告诉加里森他们希望他早日康复并回到学校继续授业。

外观

加里森穿着深绿色的裤子和绿色的夹克、黑色的鞋子。他同时也戴着一副黑框眼镜。他的头顶只有两侧有灰色的头发，而中间大部分都已经谢顶了。

作为女人时，她将原来的夹克裁剪成背心，并穿着更短的裤子与新的白鞋子。她还戴了耳环还涂了口红，但她的发型没有变化。

在重新成为男人后，加里森的服装与原来的差不多，唯一值得注意的是他多加了一条腰带而且衣领有些许变化。

加里森的头发是灰色的，从"要你肥4000"中就可以知道他从小时候开始就是这样。但在"卡特曼的荡妇妈"中他青年时的头发却变成了棕色，这或许是因为他为了参加派对故意染成的。

在第二十季中，自从他成为共和党总统候选人后，加里森便有了人造的棕黄色皮肤和类似唐纳德·特朗普的发型。作为美国总统时，加里森穿着深蓝色西服和红领带。在“快放下它”中可以看到加里森已经不戴他的眼镜了。

个性

赫伯特·加里森有着许多心理问题并且多次在剧中表现出来。他最突出的问题是用不同玩偶表现出的多重人格分裂。在早期，当加里森还在教三年级时，他一直拿着一个叫帽子先生的玩偶。加里森用它来展示自己的第二种极端的人格以及掩盖内心的矛盾。其中最主要的矛盾是他不承认但实际上又是同性恋的事实。虽然有许多证据来表明加里森是一个同性恋，但他却对此十分抵触并坚持认为自己是直男。相反地他一直强调帽子先生才是同性恋。加里森还表现出对同性恋者的厌恶并认为他们不配为人。他曾经对斯坦说：“基佬们都是恶魔，他们的心里充满着的不是像你我一般的血，而是泔水里的油！”

加里森还是一个种族主义者，他的这一特点在"圣诞便便汉基先生"中首次表现出来：他建议将墨西哥人排除出圣诞节。这在"加拿大的圣诞节"中再次出现，市长愤怒地回答道：“加里森先生，每年你都提出这样的建议但我们每年的答复都是不行！”。在"邻居来也"中，当富有的黑人们移居到了南方公园时，加里森集结了镇上的男人们想要赶他们走。加里森等人披上白床单装扮成“幽灵”来恐吓黑人们并在他们的房子前竖立起了燃烧的十字架，这样的标志寓意着：“是时候该滚了！”（Time to Leave）。当黑人们被驱逐后，加里森建议将他们遗留的豪宅卖掉大赚一笔，但其他人并没有同意。这时加里森说道：“至少我们赶走那些可恶的黑-（Nig-）”（此时画面被切换），这充分暴露出了他的原始动机。加里森也是三K党成员，但他说只有帽子先生才是，这有反映了他用玩偶来掩盖自己内心的矛盾。尽管如此，加里森却和学校里的黑人员工大厨相处得很好，她甚至在大厨的葬礼上掩面哭泣。

加里森是一个不称职的老师，他总是教学生们一些没用的东西，比如为什么楚比·切克会离开披头士，还曾用整整一周的时间在班上放映《巴纳比·琼斯》的录像带。他还教过学生们一些过于超前的知识，例如斯大林和共产主义。只有在一些场合（尤其是在他变性后），加里森才会表现得像一个正常老师并教学生们一些课堂内的知识。此外他还经常辱骂回答错问题的学生。事实上加里森之所以教授更多的流行文化知识，是因为他不懂得或根本不理睬学校的课程安排。

在加里森放弃帽子先生后，他的性格开始变得好斗激进，经常将事情推向一个极端。在出柜后，他开始公然对奴隶先生实施一些极其猥琐的性行为，当然这大多是由于他想被学校开除以获得赔偿。然而在变成女人后，她沉迷于宣扬自己有多么女人味并做了许多粗鄙之事，例如大声向其他女人喊道月经是多么美妙的事。之后加里森与理查德·道金斯建立起了短暂的关系。她放弃了原先的信仰因为道金斯发现了她的“迷人之处”，而她也从对无神论的排斥到现在的狂热。同样地当她与一个女人发生性行为后，她便决定成为一个女同性恋。随后加里森与当地女同酒吧里的女人都做了爱并沉迷于这种随意的性行为。这些极端的转变和对信仰的态度再加上偏激的举动，使得加里森对所有不同意他观点的人都十分排斥。事实上，这些都说明了加里森是一个自恋狂。

在早期剧集中有暗示加里森可能与卡特曼的宠物猪“小蓬蓬”发生过性行为，这意味着他还享受兽交。此外在"史前怪物"中，加里森建议说将鸭嘴怪交给他喂养，但大家却说加里森有一次与自家的鸽子发生过性行为。然而加里森却说这个鸽子是一个荡妇并让没有与鸟做过爱的人举手，结果所以人都举起了手。

由于加里森和男人、女人都交往过，所以很难判断他是否还是个同性恋。也许最准确的回答应该是大厨在"亡命宽容营"中说：加里森与同性恋有很大的区别，他实际上就是一个变态。此外加里森还是一个恋童癖者，因为他在"北美恋童癖协会"中试图与小男孩发生不正当关系。

自从在第十二季变回男人以后，加里森的行为比以前正常了许多，再也没有表现出变态的性行为、无耻暴躁的性格以及精神不正常现象。相反地，他或多或少表现得像一个合格而且正常的老师（虽然在 "超欢乐时光"中他打算献出学生当人质，在"选举热潮"中担心奥巴马当选后世界就要毁灭了）。

但在第十九季的“我的国家在何处？”中他古怪的性格再一次展现了出来：他因为辱骂学校里的加拿大移民而被学校解雇。加里森通过“把他们全操死”的口号展开了对加拿大的政治斗争。在操死加拿大总统后，他决定参加总统竞选，并让凯瑟琳·詹纳作为他的竞选伙伴因为他们都是“变性人”。

帽子先生，树枝先生，和奴隶先生

在剧集中，加里森有过三名“教师助理”。其中的第一个是帽子先生。加里森通过这个手偶表达自己平时不敢表露出的内心世界，比如他是一名男同性恋。他经常使用帽子先生来说出自己从一开始就不敢直说的话。作为他的内心从不承认的一部分，赫伯特·加里森声称帽子先生是一名男同性恋，同时是一名种族歧视者。但同时，帽子先生可以在加里森不在场时自主行动，这让很多人产生疑问，帽子先生是不是真的有了自己的意识。比如说帽子先生曾驾车撞穿监狱墙，劫狱救出加里森和大厨，在这个过程中，手偶几次眨眼并转动眼球。但他和加里森对于是否参加KKK集会时，加里森拒绝，随后帽子先生自己消失了。可以确认的是，加里森自从小时候就带着帽子先生了。

File:Herbert Garrison.png

Mr. Garrison with Mr. Hat

加里森在之后使用树枝先生来代替帽子先生的职位。树枝先生是一个有和帽子先生完全相同的树枝，他有和帽子先生一样的声音直到他的最后一集，在这一集中他的英语有法语口音（但考虑到他和加里森的对话本身有着发展浪漫关系的意图，这可能只是一个单纯的玩笑）。他的班级讨厌树枝先生并且希望加里森让帽子先生回来。但他坚持帽子先生不会回来了。在“援助大厨”中，树枝先生总是会发生不幸的意外。加里森随后发现他们都被帽子先生诅咒了，后者希望他带它回来。在这一集结尾，树枝先生帮助加里森意识到帽子先生才是他的最佳选择，之后便被遗弃。在那之后树枝先生再也没出现过。。

在之后的剧集“200”中，加里森被埃里克·卡特曼和他的手部图绘米奇·康纳胁迫，后两者逼他把帽子先生再次带了出来，这是为了揭露埃里克·卡特曼的生父身份（曾被认为和卡特曼的母亲是同一人）。加里森在开始时就对这个再次使用手偶的举动表达出了厌恶，并称自己已经不需要它了。但是米奇·康纳却在同卡特曼和加里森的三人对话进行时和帽子先生打起了招呼，宣称两人是老朋友和战友关系。加里森似乎很不愿意再次和帽子先生说话，就好像手偶是活着的一样。

犯罪记录

Mr. Garrison has committed numerous misdemeanors and felonies throughout the series.

赫伯特·加里森在剧集中犯下了多许民事和刑事罪行

• 暴力侵犯：在“女同酒吧”中，她攻击了被派到“蕾丝波”酒吧交涉的波斯代表，并在此过程中踢中了对方的鼠蹊部（位于大腿内侧上方，很接近生殖器）。
• 谋杀未遂：在“要你肥4000”中，他尝试在凯茜·李·吉福德访问南方公园时杀死她，作为她在儿时电视表演秀上羞辱他的报复。即使斯坦·马什和温蒂·泰斯塔伯格尝试劝说并使他冷静下来，他依旧对凯茜开枪，但却意外击中了肯尼·麦考密克。
• 越狱：在“援助大厨”中，他和大厨一起在帽子先生摧毁墙体之后从巴布雷迪警官的牢房中出逃。
• 绑架/非法拘禁：在“广告的真相”中，他和维多利亚校长及凯瑟琳·珍妮弗一起绑架并审问兰迪·马什，尝试从后者嘴中查出“全食超市”，“镇城区”，和“政确德尔塔联谊会”在他们离开后出现的原因。
• 谋杀：在“要你肥4000”中，他在暗杀凯茜·李·吉福德时意外杀死了肯尼·麦考密克。
• 纵火：在“沃尔玛来袭”中，他和其他人一起放火烧毁了两座商铺，沃尔玛超市和吉姆药房
• 奸杀：在“我的国家在何处？”中，他操死了加拿大总理。
• 尝试与儿童发生关系/恋童癖：在“北美恋童癖协会”中，他尝试在网上联络儿童并尝试和他们发生关系。当在码头意外发现自己的约会对象是埃里克·卡特曼时，他被FBI逮捕，并因此暂时丢了工作。
• （可能的）人兽交：在“象猪交配”和“史前怪物”中，他被暗指和卡特曼的宠物猪以及一只鸽子发生过性关系。

人物关系

Mr. Garrison has had both male and female relationships before, during and after his sex change, because of this it's unclear what his sexuality is, it is likely that he is bisexual or pansexual.

Mr. Slave

Mr. Garrison starting dating Mr. Slave in "[Death Camp of Tolerance|The Death Camp of Tolerance]", this relationship lasted until his sex change operation. They had a falling out in "[That Egg!|Follow That Egg!]", where Mr. (at the time, Ms.) Garrison tried to sabotage Mr. Slave's and [Gay Al|Big Gay Al]'s wedding. Its hinted in "[Funny|Not Funny]" that Garrison might still have some feelings for Slave.

Richard Dawkins

Richard Dawkins was Ms. Garrison's first boyfriend since the sex change operation. This relationship was formed in "[God Go|Go God Go]" when Richard asks her on a date, He also successfully "converted" her to Atheism though this was probably just said because she was afraid to lose the first man who has found her attractive, in the future they get married and rid the world of religion, however thanks to [Cartman|Eric Cartman] who uses the [Prank Time Phone|time phone in] "[God Go XII|Go God Go XII]" to contact Mr. Garrison he reveals to Richard the truth about the sex change operation and doing so proceeds Richard to break up with her and runs out of the house in disgust.

Alison

Allison was one of the women who Ms. Garrison experimented with in "[[2]]" and officially made her a lesbian, it is unclear if they were dating or just friends with benefits, however after the events of the episode it may be clear that they never spoke again.

冷知识

• Garrison's sexual orientation remains ambiguous since his multiple sex-change operations. Forming relationships with both men and women, he is shown having a preference for both sexes.
• He may or may not have had sexual intercourse with [Stotch|Stephen Stotch], as both of them were revealed to be regular visitors to [White Swallow|The White Swallow] bathhouse in "[Very Own Episode|Butters' Very Own Episode]", however this could have been where he met [Slave|Mr. Slave].
• He is probably fond of bestiality, as it was implied in "[Elephant Makes Love to a Pig|An Elephant Makes Love to a Pig]" and "[[3]]", that he has had sex with a pigeon and Cartman's pet pig.
• Mr. Garrison appears to be quite fond of [McCormick|Kenny], as in the episode "[Friends Forever|Best Friends Forever]" he is seen trying to bring food to Kenny in the hospital but gets arrested.
• [Hat|Mr. Hat] is known to be a racist, member of KKK, in "[Goes Nanners|Chef Goes Nanners]" and Mr. Garrison stays out of the KKK and apologizes to an irate [[4]] for Mr. Hat's involvement. However, in "[Comes the Neighborhood|Here Comes the Neighborhood]" Garrison seems to be racist as well. He is also spotted during town

  File:1106 battle-cry.jpg

  Ms. Garrison leading the riot in "[[1]]".

  meetings suggesting to get rid of all the Mexicans as shown in "[Hankey, the Christmas Poo|Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo]" and "[Christmas in Canada|It's Christmas in Canada]".
• When Mr. Garrison shows off his new boobs in "[Garrison's Fancy New Vagina|Mr. Garrison's Fancy New Vagina]", while grotesque looking, they are more or less equal in shape and size. However in "[God Go|Go God Go]", when his reveals them again, they are even more misshapen, with one being notably smaller than the other. This may be due to one of them being damaged in "[Days Before the Day After Tomorrow|Two Days Before the Day After Tomorrow]".
• Mr. Garrison carries a gun with him to class, it is unknown why and it also unknown why he didn't use it when his whole class was held hostage in Pioneer Village in "[Fun Time|Super Fun Time]", although it could have been confiscated by the staff at school, the robbers, or he may have simply forgot to bring it.
• Despite his sex-change and several seasons as a woman, Garrison was often addressed as "Mr." rather than "Mrs." by many of the students and even his colleagues in class.
• Mr. Garrison is also one of only two teachers at South Park Elementary (the other being [Mackey|Mr. Mackey]) who have been fired from the school, but later returned.
• In the episode "[Hair Tampons|Cherokee Hair Tampons]", his name that appears on the cover of his best-selling book is Ethan P. Garrison, a possible pen-name.
• Mr. Garrison seems to get some of his more bizarre world views from his mother. When he returns home

  

  World Wide Recorder Concert]"

  in "[Wide Recorder Concert|World Wide Recorder Concert]", his mother encourages his father to molest him (both she and her son see it as a sign of love) and is distraught upon hearing from Garrison that her husband never molested Garrison as a child. Mr. Garrison also seems to have inherited his mother's appearance more than his father's.
• Before being a teacher, he was going to be an engineer. He studied mechanical engineering at university and in "[Wide Recorder Concert|World Wide Recorder Concert]" his father's gas station sign reads "Garrison and Son". How he came to leave his father's business and teach in Colorado has not yet been revealed. This also implies that he is an only child.
• Mr. Garrison invented [[5]], a high speed vehicle that he built to put airplane companies out of business, but his business was shut down by the government due to airports losing money.
• It is revealed in "[Entity|The Entity]" that Mr. Garrison is left handed.
• His relationship with Mr. Hat was very similar to The Ventriloquist and Scarface from the Batman series. The reason is that they both had a puppet that they claim to have a mind of its own, they both wear glasses, and they forced the owners to kill people.
• Even outside of school, he is still referred to by his teacher name, "Mr. Garrison", rather than his first name "Herbert".

出场剧集

• "[Gets an Anal Probe|Cartman Gets an Anal Probe]"- Debut appearance. Denies Kyle's request to leave the classroom.
• "[Gain 4000|Weight Gain 4000]" - Attempts to kill [Lee Gifford|Kathie Lee Gifford] because he lost to her in a school talent show as a child.
• "[[6]]"
• "[Gay Al's Big Gay Boat Ride|Big Gay Al's Big Gay Boat Ride]"
• "[Elephant Makes Love to a Pig|An Elephant Makes Love to a Pig]" - Gives his class science projects and is angry at [[7]] when his clone beats him. Later, he is seen talking to the Marsh parents.
• "[[8]]" - Protests for Terrance and Phillip to be taken off the air and gets explosive diarrhea from [McCormick|Kenny].
• "[[9]]"
• "[Marvin|Starvin' Marvin]" - Wonders how [Boys|the boys] got an African boy. 
• "[Hankey, The Christmas Poo|Mr. Hankey, The Christmas Poo]" - Suggests that the town get rid of all the Mexicans, which [McDaniels|Mayor McDaniels] denies.
• "[[10]]" - At first bets his money on [[11]], but changes it to [[12]] when he finds out that Jesus weighs far more than Satan.
• "[Rhinoplasty|Tom's Rhinoplasty]" - Quits his job as a teacher to get a nose job.
• "[[13]]" - Sleeps on his class' field trip.
• "[Mom is a Dirty Slut|Cartman's Mom is a Dirty Slut]" - One of [Cartman|Eric Cartman]'s potential fathers and admits to making love to [Cartman|Liane Cartman] at the drunken barn dance.
• "[Mom is Still a Dirty Slut|Cartman's Mom is Still a Dirty Slut]"
• "[[14]]" - Gives Cartman an F for his book report.
• "[Wee Wee|Ike's Wee Wee]" - Takes drugs Mr. Mackey hands out in class.
• "[Fetus Lady|Conjoined Fetus Lady]" (cameo)
• "[Mexican Staring Frog of Southern Sri Lanka|The Mexican Staring Frog of Southern Sri Lanka]" - Gives the boys detention for Jimbo's story.
• "[on the Edge of Forever (Flashbacks)|City on the Edge of Forever (Flashbacks)]" - Seen in the "Weight Gain 4000" flashback.
• "[Sucks|Summer Sucks]" - Upset about Mr. Hat's departure.
• "[Chocolate Salty Balls|Chef's Chocolate Salty Balls]"
• "[[15]]" - When everyone gets chickenpox, he asks them to write essays.
• "[Ebert Should Lay off the Fatty Foods|Roger Ebert Should Lay off the Fatty Foods]" - Takes his class on a field trip.
• "[[16]]" - Sends Stan to [Mackey|Mr. Mackey]'s office for passing a note in class.
• "[Days|Cow Days]" - Complains about the rides at the carnival.
• "[Aid|Chef Aid]"
• "[[17]]" - Gives his class a report on current events and assigns them to groups.
• "[Shmainforest|Rainforest Shmainforest]" - Sends [Boys|The Boys] to Mr. Mackey's office for being rude to the [Gay With Kids|Getting Gay With Kids] choir.
• "[Combustion|Spontaneous Combustion]" - [Marsh|Randy Marsh] asks Mr Garrison to help him, but Mr Garrison claims that does not know him.
• "[Succubus|The Succubus]" - The Boys ask him for advice and goes to Chef wedding.
• "[[18]]" - Volunteers to take care of the Jakovasaur that [Boys|The Boys] found in the forest.
• "[Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut|South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut]"
• "[Harassment Panda|Sexual Harassment Panda]"
• "[Guys Naked in a Hot Tub|Two Guys Naked in a Hot Tub]" - Seen at the meteor shower party.
• "[Groovy Pirate Ghost Mystery|Korn's Groovy Pirate Ghost Mystery]"
• "[[19]]" - Tells [McDaniels|Mayor McDaniels] that he cannot teach his class due to the Chinpokomon toys.
• "[on Monkey Fonics|Hooked on Monkey Fonics]" - Eric Cartman tries to answer questions, but Mr. Garrison denies him due to him never knowing the right answer.
• "[Marvin in Space|Starvin' Marvin in Space]" - Seen teaching class until the FBI comes in and removes the [Boys|The Boys].
• "[Red Badge of Gayness|The Red Badge of Gayness]" - Part of the civil; war reenactment.
• "[Hankey's Christmas Classics|Mr. Hankey's Christmas Classics]" - Sings a song named [Fucking Christmas|Merry Fucking Christmas].
• "[You There God? It's Me, Jesus|Are You There God? It's Me, Jesus]" - Tells Jesus that he want to hear something new for the New Year.
• "[Wide Recorder Concert|World Wide Recorder Concert]" - Goes to visit his parents and questions his father as to why he did not sexually abuse him.
• "[2000|Timmy 2000]"
• "[Joins NAMBLA|Cartman Joins NAMBLA]" - Arrested after a sexual encounter with Cartman.
• "[Hair Tampons|Cherokee Hair Tampons]" - Advised by Mr. Mackey to write a novel after he loses his job as a teacher.
• "[Goes Nanners|Chef Goes Nanners]"
• "[the Handicapped Go to Hell?|Do the Handicapped Go to Hell?]"
• "[Grade|Fourth Grade]" - [Choksondik|Ms. Choksondik] goes to him for advice on how to teach his old students and later tries to get his job back as a third grade teacher, but instead becomes a kindergarten teacher.
• "[Keeper|Trapper Keeper]" - First seen as a kindergarten teacher.
• "[Keller! The Musical|Helen Keller! The Musical]" - Seen watching the play.
• "[Camp|Fat Camp]" - Seen at the meeting about Cartman's weight and states he is there because wanted to see the look on Cartman's face.
• "[Hits the Fan|It Hits the Fan]" - Talks to the kindergartners about the word "shit".
• "[Fight|Cripple Fight]" (cameo) - Seen in the crowd while Jimmy tells jokes.
• "[and Phillip: Behind the Blow|Terrance and Phillip: Behind the Blow]" - Seen watching Terrance and Phillip: Behind the Blow.
• "[[20]]" - Tells Cartman that he should keep his money in the bank.
• "[Condom Use|Proper Condom Use]" - Teaches his kindergartner class sexual education.
• "[[21]]" - Seen taking a shower, when the military comes in to shoot his towel.
• "[to Eat with Your Butt|How to Eat with Your Butt]"
• "[Entity|The Entity]" - Designs a vehicle named [[22]] due to airline people being lazy.
• "[Comes the Neighborhood|Here Comes the Neighborhood]" - Works with other male adults in South Park to get rid of the rich people.
• "[Dies|Kenny Dies]" - Is the minister at Kenny's funeral.
• "[Very Own Episode|Butters' Very Own Episode]" (heard, but not seen) - He can be heard in the stem room.
• "[Has Aides|Jared Has Aides]" - Seen in the angry mob chasing [Fogle|Jared Fogle].
• "[New Terrance and Phillip Movie Trailer|The New Terrance and Phillip Movie Trailer]" - Seen in [Bar and Cocktails|Skeeter's Bar and Cocktails], when the boys come in the bar to watch The Terrance and Phillip Movie Trailer.
• "[Simpsons Already Did It|The Simpsons Already Did It]" - Ask Butters if he has seen Mr Hat and is later at Cartman's showing him the sea-people.
• "[Ladder to Heaven|A Ladder to Heaven]" - States that a ladder to heaven is "fucking stupid".
• "[Death Camp of Tolerance|The Death Camp of Tolerance]" - Tries to get fired for being gay, but is not successful. The principal later sends him and Mr. Slave to the "Death Camp of Tolerance".
• "[Sleigh Down|Red Sleigh Down]" - Seen in the crowd.
• "[Paper|Toilet Paper]" - Gets his student to do a report on the founding fathers.
• "[a Little Bit Country|I'm a Little Bit Country]" - Gives his class a report on the founding fathers.
• "[Butt and Pancake Head|Fat Butt and Pancake Head]" - Seen when Cartman is giving his speech, tells Butters to pay attention and goes outside to see [Lopez|Jennifer Lopez].
• "[Crime Stoppers|Lil' Crime Stoppers]"
• "[Man's Greed|Red Man's Greed]" - He along with the of the town is forced to move out of [Park (Location)|South Park (Location)] due the native Americans building their casino.
• "[Park is Gay!|South Park is Gay!]" - Upset about the metrosexual fed in South Park and goes to New York City to kill the Queer Eye for the Straight Guy people.
• "[Dawn|Grey Dawn]"
• "[About Mormons|All About Mormons]" - Introduces [Harrison|Gary Harrison] as a new member their his classroom.
• "[Out|Butt Out]" - Tells [Reiner|Rob Reiner] to butt out.
• "[Christmas in Canada|It's Christmas in Canada]" - Once again suggests to get rid of all the Mexicans.
• "[Times with Weapons|Good Times with Weapons]" - Angry about Eric Cartman walking nude in the stage.
• "[Got F'd in the A|You Got F'd in the A]"
• "[[23]]" (cameo) - Seen laughing at a video of Cartman dancing with a [Timberlake|Justin Timberlake] doll.
• "[Jeffersons|The Jeffersons]" (cameo)
• "[[24]]" - Teaches his class to future language.
• "[and Turd|Douche and Turd]" - Is the one who finds that the PETA members have been murdered.
• "[Wall-Mart This Way Comes|Something Wall-Mart This Way Comes]"
• "[[25]]" (In flashback) - Seen in the crowd, when [Claridge|Miss Claridge] is being carried into a ambulance.
• "[for Ratings|Quest for Ratings]" - Seen buying cough medicine with Mr. Slave.
• "[Spoiled Whore Video Playset|Stupid Spoiled Whore Video Playset]"
• "[Critter Christmas|Woodland Critter Christmas]" - Tells Cartman to stop telling his Christmas story due to it being anti-Semitic.
• "[Garrison's Fancy New Vagina|Mr. Garrison's Fancy New Vagina]" - Becomes female in this episode.
• "[Hippie, Die|Die Hippie, Die]" - Waves goodbye to [Cartman|Eric Cartman], [Stotch|Linda Stotch], [Marsh|Randy Marsh] and [[26]], they leave to drill through hippies.
• "[[27]]"
• "[Friends Forever|Best Friends Forever]" - Attempts to bring food to Kenny, but gets arrested for it.
• "[Day|Erection Day]" - Narrates the school talent show.
• "[Days Before the Day After Tomorrow|Two Days Before the Day After Tomorrow]" - Seen with damaged breasts.
• "[[28]]" - Welcomes Butters disguised as a girl named Marjorine.
• "[That Egg!|Follow That Egg!]" - Tries to stop the wedding between Big Gay Al and Mr. Slave, but is unsuccessful.
• "[Kids|Ginger Kids]"
• "[Mary|Bloody Mary]" - Invites [Marsh|Randy Marsh] to talk about his drunk driving.
• "[Return of Chef|The Return of Chef]" - Seen at Chef's funeral.
• "[Alert!|Smug Alert!]" - Buys a Hybird car with along with everyone else in [Park (Location)|South Park (Location)].
• "[Wars Part I|Cartoon Wars Part I]" - Does Muslim-Sensitivity Training with her class.
• "[[29]]" (cameo) - Seen at the assembly about manbearpig.
• "[of the Urinal Deuce|Mystery of the Urinal Deuce]"
• "[God Go|Go God Go]"
• "[God Go XII|Go God Go XII]"
• "[Sucks|Cartman Sucks]" - Asks Cartman about the photo involving him and Butters.
• "[Capades|Lice Capades]" - Tells the class that everybody had lice in their hair.
• "[Snuke|The Snuke]" - Tells Cartman that not all Muslim people are terrorists.
• "[[30]]" - Becomes a lesbian in this episode and works together with other lebisans in order to prevent the lesbian bar from shutting down.
• "[Petit Tourette|Le Petit Tourette]" - Unable to teach her class due to Eric Cartman's frequent cursing.
• "[List|The List]" (cameo)
• "[Trouble|Tonsil Trouble]" (cameo)
• "[New Look|Britney's New Look]" - Seen taking photos of [Spears|Britney Spears], along with many other people.
• "[Boobage|Major Boobage]" - Seen in class at the beginning of the episode.
• "[A Penis!|Eek, A Penis!]" - Returns to male as of this episode.
• "[Logging|Over Logging]"
• "[Fun Time|Super Fun Time]" - He and his class are hold hostage.
• "[Cancer Show Ever|Breast Cancer Show Ever]" - Asks Cartman to stop being offensive to Wendy's speech about breast cancer and gives Cartman a detention for crapping on his desk.
• "[[31]]"
• "[2: The Startling|Pandemic 2: The Startling]"
• "[Last Night...|About Last Night...]" - Seen as a supporter of [McCain|John McCain].
• "[School Musical|Elementary School Musical]"
• "[Ring|The Ring]" (cameo) - Seen at Kenny's funeral.
• "[Coon|The Coon]" - Seen in the crowd and realizes that someone from his class is [[32]].
• "[[33]]" - The townspeople throw squirrels at him.
• "[Pray, Queef|Eat, Pray, Queef]" - Seen singing along with other men in [Park (Location)|South Park (Location)].
• "[[34]]"
• "[Derby|Pinewood Derby]"
• "[[35]]"
• "[Bottom Bitch|Butters' Bottom Bitch]"
• "[F Word|The F Word]"
• "[with Smurfs|Dances with Smurfs]" (cameo) - Seen in class.
• "[Healing|Sexual Healing]"
• "[Tale of Scrotie McBoogerballs|The Tale of Scrotie McBoogerballs]"
• "[Have 0 Friends|You Have 0 Friends]"
• "[[36]]"
• "[[37]]"
• "[a Jersey Thing|It's a Jersey Thing]"
• "[[38]]"
• "[[39]]"
• "[Pudding|Royal Pudding]" - Seen teaching his class until Mr. Mackey comes in.
• "[Burgers|Ass Burgers]" - Seen teaching his class.
• "[to Mouth|Bass to Mouth]"
• "[[40]]" (cameo) - Seen during the school assessmbly.
• "[History Channel Thanksgiving|A History Channel Thanksgiving]" - Gives his class a history report on Thanksgiving.
• "[Cowgirl|Reverse Cowgirl]"
• "[[41]]"
• "[Finds Love|Cartman Finds Love]"
• "[Nightmare on Face Time|A Nightmare on Face Time]"
• "[Scause For Applause|A Scause For Applause]"
• "[Murder Porn|Informative Murder Porn]"
• "[War Zimmerman|World War Zimmerman]"
• "[Strange|Taming Strange]"
• "[Hobbit|The Hobbit]"
• "[Free Ebola|Gluten Free Ebola]" - Bothered by Mr. Mackey talking about being gluten free.
• "[Cissy|The Cissy]" - Explains transgenderism to [Victoria|Principal Victoria] and [Mackey|Mr. Mackey].
• "[Magic Bush|The Magic Bush]"
• "[Magic|Cock Magic]"
• "[[42]]" - Confused about [[43]].
• "[and Brave|Stunning and Brave]" - Mentions the time he was a lesbian.
• "[My Country Gone?|Where My Country Gone?]" - Mr. Garrison is fired from his job as a teacher for his racist remark at the Canadian students and runs for president of the United States.
• "[Content|Sponsored Content]" - Seen at his presidential campaign, greeted by Principal Victoria and travels back to South Park to stop the town fate ending.
• "[and Advertising|Truth and Advertising]" - Arrives back in South Park and see the changes to the town, he also kidnaps [Marsh|Randy Marsh] with [Victoria|Principal Victoria] and [Jenner|Caitlyn Jenner].
• "[Principal Final Justice|PC Principal Final Justice]"
• "[Berries|Member Berries]"
• "[Damned|The Damned]" - Tries unsuccessfully to get people to vote for [Clinton|Hillary Clinton].
• "[and a Danish|Douche and a Danish]" - Tries to run away from his campaign, and participates in the Memberberries addiction group.
• "[Collins|Fort Collins]" - Seen delivering a speech imploring voters to vote for [Clinton|Hillary Clinton] after he and [Marsh|Randy Marsh] attempt to destroy the [[44]].
• "[Jeez|Oh, Jeez]" - "Infected" with Memberberries, he accepts his Presidential victory and spreads the infection to Randy via [Jenner|Caitlyn Jenner].
• "[Only|Members Only]"
• "[Funny|Not Funny]" - Seen being "tricked" into bombing [[45]] by [Slave|Mr. Slave] and then not to by [Broflovski|Kyle Broflovski].
• "[End of Serialization as We Know It|The End of Serialization as We Know It]" - Seen at learning about online trolling and promising federal assistance to Kyle and his efforts against [[46]].
• "[It Down|Put It Down]" - Torments [Tweak|Tweek] by sending tweets about him to antagonize North Korea.
• "[A Witches|Sons A Witches]" - Butters and Stan call him to help get rid of the witch which is kidnapping children.
• "[Down|Doubling Down]"
• "[Tomato|Splatty Tomato]"