克里斯·施瓦伦波斯是一名第四新闻台的新闻记者，他的形象很接近汤姆·帕斯里克，后者有可能已经在“无处不在”死去了。Chris Swollenballs is a news reporter for Channel 4 News. He closely resembles Tom Pusslicker, who may have died in "Pandemic". Chris Swollenballs was attacked in "Night of the Living Homeless", trying to convince some homeless he didn't have any change. The homeless walked towards him, he screamed and the camera shut off, hinting that he died. However, Chris Swollenballs reappeared unharmed two episodes later in "More Crap".
Chris Swollenballs wears a brown suit, a white and blue shirt, and a dark red tie. He has combed blond hair and blond eyebrows.
In "Night of the Living Homeless", he wears a black suit with a striped, light-blue tie, and a wired receiver on his right ear. His hair is still blond, but is instead parted to the right.
"Jared Has Aides" "Fun with Veal" "A Ladder to Heaven" "I'm a Little Bit Country" (cameo) "The Losing Edge" "The Death of Eric Cartman" "Bloody Mary" "Night of the Living Homeless" "More Crap"