South Park Archives

The Wrestling Audition Song was sung at the W.T.F. tryouts in the Season Thirteen episode, "W.T.F.".


Eric Cartman decides to hold auditions for better wrestlers, so he can impress W.W.E. president Vince McMahon at the next W.T.F. performance. A wrestler only known by his audition number of 37, performs a monologue and gets the job as Irene's aborted baby during the next show.

The song is set to music from A Chorus Line, "Nothing."


All my life, all I ever wanted was to be a wrestler
Fighting in the ring,
Winning that belt.
And so I dreamed every night that I was the Undertaker
Smashing skulls in,
Breaking arms.
But I'm so full of doubt this is something I can do.
Do I have what it takes inside?—

Songs from Season Thirteen
Bullet with Butterfly Wings | Fuck the Pain Away | Gay Fish | Hava Nagila | I've Got a Ring on My Finger | Japanese Prison Blues | Just a Little Girl | Love You Bay-Bay | Minorities at my Water Park | Poker Face ft. Cartman | Pomp and Circumstance: March No. 1 | Queef Free | Somalian Pirates We | We're Going to the Water Park | Wrestling Audition Song

See also: List of Songs | List of Minor Characters from Season Thirteen | Season Thirteen