"What the Hell Child is This?" is a parody song featured only on the album, Mr. Hankey's Christmas Classics.

Isaac Hayes sings a soul/R&B ballad in the style that made him famous in the 1970s. The song starts out as a replication of the gospel song "What Child is This" and slowly becomes a double-entendre about "making love" with Chef exchanging Christmas puns with his back singers.


Baby, you know there's a lot of love between us Sometimes that love goes bad But other times its so right! Yeah, I know we've been through some rough waters But most of the time our thing is off the hook! I just want to know one thing...
What child is this You've laid to rest At my feet This is not the time. I know that I'm not responsible It's white so it cannot be mine.
No, this, this is Christ the King. With a feeling of relief I cannot sing.
Haste, haste to bring him laud The Babe, the Son of Mary. Mmmmm, Son of Mary! (Son of Mary)
Little bitty baby! (Mary)
So, bring him incense, gold, and myrrh Come peasant king to own Him. The King of kings, salvation brings, Let loving hearts enthrone Him.
Raise, raise the song on high The Virgin sings her lullaby. Joy, joy, for Christ is born The Babe, the Son of Mary.
Son of Mary (Son of Mary)
Little bitty baby (Little bitty baby, yeah)
I'm gonna lay you down by the yule log I'm gonna gonna love you right. Baby, I'm gonna deck your halls And silent your night!
You'll hear the herald angels sing When I'm sliding off your bra. I just can't wait to jingle your bells And fa la la your la! (Fa la la your la)
This, this is Christmas Day A time for lovers to celebrate. I'm gonna ding dong you merrily on high Because this is the season for giving! (Give it to me baby, give it to me baby)
Season for giving (Season for giving, give me love!)
Giving you love (Give me love!)
Whole lotta love (Give me love!)
Making love (Season for giving)
By the fire (Give me love!)
Whole lotta love (Season for good love)
By the fire (Give me love!)
Don't need no mistletoe (Season for giving)
You've got toes (Give me love!)
Whole lotta loving (Season for good love!)
Love (Give me love!)
Jingle bells (Season for giving, give me love!
Fa la la your la. (Season for good love, give me love!)

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