My Favorite Episodes
My Favorite Characters
My Favorite Quote
- "Then one time, I believe it was July—"
- "August. There's a knock on the door. I open it, and there's this cute little Girl Scout—"
- "Aww, she was so adorable with the little pigtails and all."
- "And she says to me, 'How would you like to buy some cookies?', and I said, 'Well, what kind you have?' She had thin mints, graham crunchy things—"
- "Raisin oatmeal."
- "Raisin oatmeal, and I said, 'We'll take a graham crunch. How much will that be?', and she looks at me and she says, 'I-I need about tree fiddy.'"
- "Tree fiddy."
- "Well, it was about that time that I noticed this Girl Scout was about eight stories tall and was a crustacean from the protozoic era."
- "The Loch Ness Monster!"
- "I said, 'Dammit, monster, get off my lawn! I ain't givin' you no tree fiddy!' It said, 'How 'bout just two fiddy?' I said, 'Oh, now it's only two fiddy? What, is there a sale on Loch Ness Munchies or somethin'?'"
- "Lord, he was angry!"
- "Damn right, I was angry!"
- "Not you, the monster! He was about to kick your ass!"
- "Aw, shut your mouth, woman!"
- —Thomas McElroy and Nelle McElroy[src]
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