List of Crying Moments

File:Good Times with Weapons Boys.jpg

The Boys fake cry in "Good Times with Weapons" (Episode 112).

The following is a compiled list, in episodic order, of instances when a character has cried:

Character	Ep.No.	Ep. Name	Reason for Crying
Kyle Broflovski	0	The Unaired Pilot	He thinks he will never see Ike again.
Jimbo Kern	3	Volcano	He feels sentimental as Ned sings "Kumbaya".
Mayor McDaniels	3	Volcano	She fake cries in front of the media to appear worried that the children camping up in the mountain will die in the impending volcano eruption.
Fluffy	5	An Elephant Makes Love to a Pig	She got all drunk and woke up next to an elephant in the morning.
Stan Marsh	5	An Elephant Makes Love to a Pig	He is about to be sent away after being framed for wreaking havoc across the town.
Eric Cartman	7	Pinkeye	He thinks about Kenny's death.
Sheila Broflovski	9	Mr. Hankey, the Christmas Poo	She misses Kyle in the mental institute.
Wendy Testaburger	11	Tom's Rhinoplasty	Her boyfriend Stan vomits for Ms. Ellen, meaning he likes her more than Wendy.
Wendy Testaburger	11	Tom's Rhinoplasty	"Apologizing" to Ms. Ellen in front of the class and "wishing her and Stan well" as a couple.
Officer Barbrady	16	Chickenlover	He feels that he is not fit to be a cop as he finds learning to read too difficult and is on the verge of giving up.
Mr. Mackey	17	Ike's Wee Wee	He worries about his future after being fired.
Sheila Broflovski Gerald Broflovski	17	Ike's Wee Wee	They witness "Ike's" death.
Sheila Broflovski	17	Ike's Wee Wee	At "Ike's" funeral.
Clyde Donovan	18	Conjoined Fetus Lady	He is painfully hit with the ball while playing dodgeball.
Last Denver Cougars Player	18	Conjoined Fetus Lady	He is painfully hit with the ball while playing dodgeball.
Multiple People Officer Barbrady	18	Conjoined Fetus Lady	They are touched by the photo montage of Nurse Gollum.
Sheila Broflovski	18	Conjoined Fetus Lady	She thinks Nurse Gollum is really touched by South Park's Conjoined Twin Myslexia Week.
Michelle	19	The Mexican Staring Frog of Southern Sri Lanka	She recounts how her husband was trapped in their overturned car for twelve hours.
Tom	19	The Mexican Staring Frog of Southern Sri Lanka	He recounts how there was no log ride in Tet during the Vietnam War.
Jimbo Kern	19	The Mexican Staring Frog of Southern Sri Lanka	Ned is catatonic.
Multiple Children	20	City on the Edge of Forever (Flashbacks)	The school bus has tumbled onto the edge of a cliff.
Boy with Red Shirt	20	City on the Edge of Forever (Flashbacks)	He can't take it anymore waiting in the stranded bus; he wants to leave and get help.
Wendy Testaburger	22	Chef's Chocolate Salty Balls	She is moved while watching a movie.
Kyle Broflovski	22	Chef's Chocolate Salty Balls	He is upset about Mr. Hankey's failing health.
Kyle Broflovski	22	Chef's Chocolate Salty Balls	Chef informs him that poo can't get into heaven.
Kyle Broflovski	22	Chef's Chocolate Salty Balls	Mr. Hankey is thrown by the film festival director and dies.
Jimbo Kern	26	Cow Days	He thinks of the Cows' suicide.
Eric Cartman	27	Chef Aid	After Chef goes to jail.
Flo Kimble	28	Spookyfish	She thinks Stan doesn't like his fish.
Sharon Marsh	28	Spookyfish	She thinks her son murdered another person.
Elvin Cartman	29	Merry Christmas Charlie Manson!	He finished his fudgesicle.
Boy	29	Merry Christmas Charlie Manson!	Kyle says that the Mr. Hankey mascot is fake.
Charlie Manson	29	Merry Christmas Charlie Manson!	Moved when the Cartman family surprises him in his cell with "Hark the Herald Angels Sing".
Kelly	32	Rainforest Shmainforest	She hates the rainforest and wants to go home.
Carol McCormick	33	Spontaneous Combustion	At Kenny's funeral; he died from spontaneous combustion.
Thomas McElroy Nelle McElroy	34	The Succubus	They feel emotional about their son's wedding.
Veronica	34	The Succubus	Kyle and Stan accuse her of being a succubus (which later turns out to be true). She fake cries so that no one will believe them.
Mr. Adler	36	Tweek vs. Craig	He never got to say goodbye to his fiancee who died in a skywriting accident while trying to write "I Love U Richard" in the sky.
Kenny McCormick	n/a	South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut	He is about to be tortured by Satan in Hell.
Satan	n/a	South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut	Saddam just wants sex and wouldn't learn to communicate.
Soldier	n/a	South Park: Bigger, Longer & Uncut	He is moved by Kyle's speech about how his mom should deal with him rather than going off to fight for causes.
Eric Cartman	37	Sexual Harassment Panda	He fake cries in court as he accuses Stan of sexual harassment.
Principal Victoria	37	Sexual Harassment Panda	She cries in court as she admits to murdering a man.
Shelly Marsh	38	Cat Orgy	Her boyfriend dumped her for refusing to have sex with him.
Jew Scout Inductee	40	Jewbilee	The Jew Elder lowers a huge bell over his head and strikes it loudly to induct him into the Jew Scouts.
Kyle Broflovski	41	Korn's Groovy Pirate Ghost Mystery	His grandmother's corpse has been taken away.
Sharon Marsh	42	Chinpokomon	Stan has been brainwashed by the Japanese.
Adolf Hitler	46	Mr. Hankey's Christmas Classics	He doesn't have a Christmas Tree.
Carol McCormick	47	Are You There God? It's Me, Jesus	Kenny died again.
Eric Cartman	50	Cartman's Silly Hate Crime 2000	He wants to get out of prison.
Quintuplets	52	Quintuplets 2000	Their grandmother died.
Stuart McCormick	53	Cartman Joins NAMBLA	He broke his balls from being gang-raped by NAMBLA members.
Stan Marsh	54	Cherokee Hair Tampons	Kyle is going to die.
Women at Fingerbang concert in Cartman's dream	56	Something You Can Do with Your Finger	They are sexually overwhelmed by Fingerbang's performance.
Clyde Donovan	59	Fourth Grade	He misses the third grade.
Heidi Turner	61	Helen Keller! The Musical	She finds her dog, Robby, dead on the street.
Chad	63	Fat Camp	He thinks he's going to be fat forever.
Eric Cartman	63	Fat Camp	He gets kicked out of the fat camp.
Kyle Broflovski	64	The Wacky Molestation Adventure	He cries as he writes a letter to Fidel Castro to get him to eradicate communism in Cuba.
Kyle Broflovski	64	The Wacky Molestation Adventure	He practices fake crying to get his parents arrested for molesting him.
Multiple Children	64	The Wacky Molestation Adventure	They pretend that their parents molested them to get them arrested.
Red Harris	65	A Very Crappy Christmas	He is upset that no one is buying toys for Christmas from his shop.
Woman	65	A Very Crappy Christmas	She is moved by the boys' animated film.
Radiohead	69	Scott Tenorman Must Die	They read Cartman's letter about Scott Tenorman's fake sob story.
Scott Tenorman	69	Scott Tenorman Must Die	He finds out that his parents are dead and they have been fed to him.
Liane Cartman Cartman Family	71	Cartmanland	At Mabel Cartman's funeral.
Kyle Broflovski	71	Cartmanland	He loses his faith in God.
Eric Cartman	71	Cartmanland	He is so happy playing by himself at Cartmanland.
Kyle Broflovski	71	Cartmanland	He painfully pops his hemorrhoid on the fence of Cartmanland.
Eric Cartman	71	Cartmanland	He lost his theme park.
Kindergartener	72	Proper Condom Use	He was scared when Mr. Garrison was putting on the condom.
Martha Thompson	75	How to Eat with Your Butt	She doesn't think her son will ever be found.
Martha Thompson	75	How to Eat with Your Butt	Her son was found.
Stan Marsh	78	Kenny Dies	He finds out that Kenny might die.
Stan Marsh	78	Kenny Dies	He is upset about Kenny's illness.
Eric Cartman Kyle Broflovski	78	Kenny Dies	They are upset about Kenny's illness.
Eric Cartman	78	Kenny Dies	He tells Congress about how stem cell research may save Kenny's life.
Linda Stotch	79	Butters' Very Own Episode	She finds out that her husband has been going to gay clubs.
Linda Stotch	79	Butters' Very Own Episode	She thinks she killed Butters.
Vanessa	82	Freak Strike	Her out-of-control teenage daughter Vanity constantly abuses her.
Russell Crowe	84	The New Terrance and Phillip Movie Trailer	Tugger tried to commit suicide.
Carol McCormick Stuart McCormick	91	A Ladder to Heaven	They are reminded of Kenny's death as they show the boys his urn.
Randy Marsh Sharon Marsh Jimbo Kern Sheila Broflovski Gerald Broflovski Multiple adults	91	A Ladder to Heaven	They are touched that the boys are building a ladder to heaven so they can see Kenny again.
Woman at abortion clinic	91	A Ladder to Heaven	She cannot bring herself to have an abortion.
Multiple Adults	91	A Ladder to Heaven	They are touched about the speech about heaven.
Linda Stotch Stephen Stotch	95	My Future Self n' Me	They are sorry about tricking Butters.
Sarah Valmer	98	Krazy Kripples	Jimmy confirms that he has joined a gang.
Sarah Valmer	98	Krazy Kripples	Detective Hyde says that the only way Jimmy is gonna get out of his gang is to get killed.
Streibel Daughters  Mrs. Streibel	99	Toilet Paper	They cry in Kyle's dream because their house got toilet papered.
Nancy Kerrigan	99	Toilet Paper	She cries in Kyle's dream after being assaulted by an assailant (live-action footage of a real event).
Officer Barbrady	99	Toilet Paper	He tells Josh Myers that his uncle Charles used to hit him with a belt.
Officer Barbrady	99	Toilet Paper	He tells Josh Myers that his dad dressed him up like a little girl on poker nights and made him sit on all his uncles' laps.
Kyle Broflovski	101	Fat Butt and Pancake Head	He cries in Cartman's dream where Cartman taunts him for being wrong, as "Jennifer Lopez" did get a record deal.
Ben Affleck	101	Fat Butt and Pancake Head	"Jennifer Lopez" turned out to be Mitch Conner, a con man who played around with his love, and subsequently committed suicide by taking a cyanide pill.
Mr. Slave	103	Red Man's Greed	He and Mr. Garrison are homeless.
Kyle Broflovski	104	South Park is Gay!	He was beaten up by the other kids for not being a metrosexual.
Mr. Slave	104	South Park is Gay!	Straight people are stealing gay culture by being metrosexual.
Eric Cartman	105	Christian Rock Hard	He didn't get his platinum album.
Linda Stotch	107	Casa Bonita	Butters is missing.
Sharon Marsh	109	Butt Out	She finds out that Stan was smoking.
Stan Marsh	110	Raisins	Wendy dumped him.
Butters Stotch	110	Raisins	Lexus dumped him.
Sheila Broflovski Gerald Broflovski	111	It's Christmas in Canada	Ike is taken away by his birth parents who won custody of him.
Clyde Donovan	111	It's Christmas in Canada	The parents decide to not get any presents for their children.
Kyle Broflovski Eric Cartman Stan Marsh Kenny McCormick	111	It's Christmas in Canada	Kyle didn't get Ike back; Eric didn't get any presents; Stan didn't have a Christmas adventure; Kenny doesn't think he's going to "go five days without dying".
Parliament Building Doorman	111	It's Christmas in Canada	The boys are crying.
Eric Cartman	111	It's Christmas in Canada	Kyle punches him in the face.
Eric Cartman Stan Marsh Kyle Broflovski Kenny McCormick	112	Good Times with Weapons	They pretend that their parents died so they can buy weapons without their parents' permission.
Butters Stotch	112	Good Times with Weapons	He receives a shuriken in his left eye.
Nancy	113	Up the Down Steroid	Jimmy violently beats her up.
Jimmy Valmer	113	Up the Down Steroid	After beating up Nancy and his mom.
Butters Stotch	116	AWESOM-O	His "robot friend" is about to be taken away from him.
Blanket Jackson	117	The Jeffersons	His father dangled him out of a window.
Blanket Jackson	117	The Jeffersons	He is disturbed by his father's behavior.
Kindergartener	119	Douche and Turd	He is disturbed by PETA's slaughterhouse footage.
Sharon Randy Marsh	119	Douche and Turd	Stan is banished from South Park for not voting.
Mr. Farkle	120	Something Wall-Mart This Way Comes	Jim's Drugs is out of business as it cannot compete with Wall-Mart's low prices.
Linda Stotch	121	Pre-School	She regrets not letting Butters back in the house as he got beaten up almost fatally by Trent Boyett.
Stan Marsh	121	Pre-School	He begs Shelly to protect him from Trent Boyett, who wants to kill him.
Kelly Anderson (mentioned only)	122	Quest for Ratings	She misses her father who has gone on a business trip to Thailand.
Paris Hilton	123	Stupid Spoiled Whore Video Playset	Tinkerbell committed suicide.
Clyde Donovan	123	Stupid Spoiled Whore Video Playset	He was forced to partake in "two minutes in the closet" with Beth.
Lion Cubs	125	Woodland Critter Christmas	Their mom was killed.
Two women	127	Die Hippie, Die	Chef bids farewell to them before bulldozing the hippies.
Eric Cartman	127	Die Hippie, Die	He bids farewell to Clyde Frog and tells him that he's the best stuffed animal he's ever had.
Tuong Lu Kim	128	Wing	His wife is about to be taken to LA by the Chinese mafia.
Kyle Broflovski	128	Wing	Kenny is killed in the gunfire with the Chinese mafia.
Kenny McCormick	131	The Death of Eric Cartman	Cartman ate all the KFC chicken skin.
Eric Cartman	131	The Death of Eric Cartman	He thinks that he is dead after his friends start ignoring him as if they couldn't see or hear him.
Eric Cartman Butters Stotch Liane Cartman	131	The Death of Eric Cartman	Eric says that he loves his mom and that he is sorry for all the bad things he has done to her.
Eric Cartman	131	The Death of Eric Cartman	He regrets bashing Kyle for being a Jew all along.
Scott Tenorman	131	The Death of Eric Cartman	He grieves at his parents' graves.
Linda Stotch	131	The Death of Eric Cartman	Butters is diagnosed with schizophrenia.
Jimmy Valmer	132	Erection Day	He is unable to perform at the talent show due to his erection.
Blaze	132	Erection Day	She is moved by how Jimmy saved Nut Gobbler's life.
Linda Stotch	134	Marjorine	She thinks Butters died.
Marjorine	134	Marjorine	The girls upset him.
Stan Marsh	135	Follow That Egg!	His and Kyle's egg is "killed" so they will fail their assignment.
Security guard	138	Free Willzyx	His boss yells at him because Jambu was kidnapped while he was on duty.
Brian	138	Free Willzyx	Mike has been fatally shot by the Animal Liberation Front.
Kyle Broflovski Clyde Donovan Butters Scotch	138	Free Willzyx	They bid their final farewell to Willzyx.
Randy Marsh	139	Bloody Mary	He thinks that his alcoholism is a disease that will kill him, and he is powerless to it.
Eric Cartman	140	The Return of Chef	Chef is leaving for good; he is going to miss him and doesn't know how to tell him.
Eric Cartman	140	The Return of Chef	After sending Chef off.
Woman Mrs. Garrison Terrance Carol McCormick	140	The Return of Chef	At Chef's funeral.
Man	142	Cartoon Wars Part I	He is afraid of a terrorist attack after a news report claims that Family Guy will be airing an episode showing the Muslim Prophet Muhammad.
Linda Stotch	142	Cartoon Wars Part I	She and Stephen left Butters behind when they took cover in the community center.
Kyle Broflovski	142	Cartoon Wars Part I	He cries in his dream where Ike gets killed by terrorist bombs, shortly before he is killed too.
Sarah	142	Cartoon Wars Part I	Her husband volunteered to not bury his head in the sand so he may get targeted by terrorists.
Kyle Broflovski	142	Cartoon Wars Part I	Cartman got his tricycle destroyed, putting him at a losing edge.
Al Gore	145	ManBearPig	He cries over the phone because Stan doesn't believe that ManBearPig is real.
Al Gore	145	ManBearPig	Nobody is taking him "cereal" about ManbearPig when the authorities are attempting to rescue The Boys from the cave-in.
Liane Cartman	146	Tsst	Eric's behavior is out of control and she is at her wit's end.
Boy in Nanny 911 commercial	146	Tsst	His older brother throws a pillow at him.
Father in Nanny 911 commercial	146	Tsst	His out-of-control daughter screams that she hates him.
Multiple children in Nanny 911 commercial	146	Tsst	Their behavior is out of control.
Jo Frost	146	Tsst	She is traumatized by Eric. She is institutionalized and spends most of her time sobbing and eating her own excrement.
Liane Cartman	146	Tsst	Eric finally becomes well-behaved (only for him to revert to his evil ways shortly after.)
911 Truth Webmaster	148	Mystery of the Urinal Deuce	President Bush has stuck a gun in his mouth, about to shoot him dead.
911 Truth Webmaster	148	Mystery of the Urinal Deuce	He pleads with Stan and Kyle not to kill him.
Ike Broflovski	149	Miss Teacher Bangs a Boy	He doesn't want Kyle to tell their mom about his relationship with his teacher.
Eric Cartman	151	Go God Go	He has been transported 500 years into the future where there is no Nintendo Wii.
Nelson Brown	153	Stanley's Cup	He doesn't want to have cancer.
Mr. and Mrs. Brown	153	Stanley's Cup	Nelson is going to die of cancer and they don't know how to tell him. They beg Stan to talk to him.
Park County Pee-Wee Hockey Team	153	Stanley's Cup	They are afraid that they will become Nelson's murderers or get cancer if they lose the hockey match.
Eric Cartman	155	Cartman Sucks	He fake cries to get his mother's attention.
Mexican laborers	159	D-Yikes!	In the book 'The Old Man and the Sea', the old man doesn't make money at the end because the sharks ate all the fish he caught.
Eric Cartman	161	Le Petit Tourette	Kyle stopped Dateline's To Catch a Predator.
Randy Marsh	162	More Crap	His record for the "biggest crap" was broken by Bono.
Bono	162	More Crap	He finds out he is "a Number 2".
Linda Stotch	163	Imaginationland	Butters is missing.
Eric Cartman Man	164	Imaginationland, Episode II	Kyle has been pronounced dead but Cartman is still desperately giving him CPR, and successfully revives him.
Man	165	Imaginationland, Episode III	He is moved by Kyle's speech about how imaginary characters are more real than real people because of the impact they have on people's lives.
Liane Cartman	168	Tonsil Trouble	Cartman has AIDS.
Tricia Tucker	170	Major Boobage	Her cat is confiscated by the police.
Eric Cartman	170	Major Boobage	He cries as he lets Rufus and two other cats stay in his attic for safety.
Eric Cartman Unnamed woman	170	Major Boobage	They cry as Cartman lets Nishka stay in his attic for safety.
Chris Crocker	171	Canada on Strike	He wants people to leave Chocolate Rain Guy, Tron Guy, and the panda alone.
Mrs. Garrison	172	Eek, a Penis!	She doesn't want to be a woman anymore.
Juanita	172	Eek, a Penis!	She cannot go to college as she is pregnant.
Mrs. Garrison	172	Eek, a Penis!	All her money is gone along with her penis.
Shelly Marsh	173	Over Logging	She misses Amir.
Butters Stotch	174	Super Fun Time	He thinks the police are looking for them after Cartman promised him that they wouldn't get caught by the police.
Eric Cartman	175	The China Probrem	He is paranoid about the "Chinese takeover".
Kyle Broflovski Stan Marsh Jimmy Valmer Clyde Donovan Kenny McCormick Stormy Weathers Mitch Murphy Multiple people	175	The China Probrem	They watched Indiana Jones getting raped.
Multiple people	175	The China Probrem	George Lucas and Steven Spielberg finally got arrested.
Eric Cartman	176	Breast Cancer Show Ever	He gets his mom to tell Wendy's parents that she wants to beat him up.
Eric Cartman	176	Breast Cancer Show Ever	Wendy beats him up.
Soldier	178	Pandemic 2: The Startling	Michael Chertoff keeps yelling at people.
Ike Broflovski	179	About Last Night...	John McCain lost the election.
Mrs. Gueermo	180	Elementary School Musical	She gets slapped by her husband.
Tammy Warner Multiple girls	182	The Ring	They are sexually overwhelmed at the Jonas Brothers' concert.
Kenny McCormick	182	The Ring	He cannot get a blowjob from his girlfriend after they decide to wear purity rings.
Eric Cartman	184	Margaritaville	He dreamt that Grand Theft Auto: Chinatown Wars melted in his hand.
Sheila Broflovski	184	Margaritaville	Kyle is paying for everyone's debts so he will be in debt or the rest of his life.
Katherine & Katie Queef	185	Eat, Pray, Queef	They fight with Terrance and Phillip over queefing during sex and chase them out.
Sharon Marsh	185	Eat, Pray, Queef	Queefing has been banned, which is another loss for women's rights.
Carlos Mencia	186	Fishsticks	He is badly beaten up by Kanye West's aides.
Jimmy Valmer	186	Fishsticks	Cartman takes all the credit for the Fishsticks Joke on The Ellen DeGeneres Show when it was really Jimmy's joke.
Emmett Hollis	187	Pinewood Derby	His father committed suicide in front of him.
Clyde Donovan	188	Fatbeard	Somalia isn't what Cartman said it would be.
Sheila Broflovski	188	Fatbeard	Ike has run away from home to become a pirate in Somalia.
Clyde Donovan	188	Fatbeard	He hates Somalia and wants to go home.
Girl	189	Dead Celebrities	She lost the Tiny Miss Pageant.
Harrison Yates (as Yolanda)	190	Butters' Bottom Bitch	Keshawn proposes to him.
Keshawn	190	Butters' Bottom Bitch	Butters lets Yolanda marry him.
Butters Stotch	190	Butters' Bottom Bitch	He witnesses Keshawn and Yolanda get engaged with his blessing.
Mr. Conners	191	W.T.F.	He is fired from his job as the wrestling coach of South Park Elementary.
Girl	192	Whale Whores	The Japanese slaughter the dolphins at the Denver Aquarium in front of her.
Eric Cartman Kenny McCormick	192	Whale Whores	They pretend to be upset that they cannot rescue whales and dolphins due to Deadliest Catch's boat blocking them.
Eric Cartman	194	Dances with Smurfs	The Smurfs, including Smurfette, are killed by "Human Wendy".
Butters Stotch	194	Dances with Smurfs	Cartman is "being silenced" from expressing his views about the school, and all the Smurfs are dead.
Eric Cartman	194	Dances with Smurfs	He is viciously insulted on the morning announcements by Casey Miller.
Eric Cartman	195	Pee	The waterpark is full of minorities.
Randy Marsh	195	Pee	Stan and his friends are inside the waterpark that was flooded by pee and he doesn't know if they survived.
Pi-Pi	195	Pee	He didn't listen to the scientists saying that there's too much pee in his waterpark, so his waterpark got destroyed.
Eric Cartman	195	Pee	He thinks he is the only non-minority who survived the pee flood and imagines a minority-dominant world.
Carol McCormick	196	Sexual Healing	At Kenny's funeral; he died from autoerotic asphyxiation.
Kyle Broflovski Butters Stotch	196	Sexual Healing	They think they will end up dying from autoerotic asphyxiation like Kenny due to their perceived sex addiction.
News Anchor Butters Stotch	197	The Tale of Scrotie McBoogerballs	Butters' book got Kim Kardashian killed.
Kyle Broflovski	199	You Have 0 Friends	His friends begin to shun him.
Eric Cartman	201	201	He finds out that he is "half-ginger"
Tom Cruise	201	201	There's nowhere on Earth where people aren't around to rip on him.
Butters Stotch	202	Crippled Summer	He is upset about Towelie's addiction.
Towelie	202	Crippled Summer	He realizes that his addiction has hurt his son.
Butters Stotch Therapist	202	Crippled Summer	Towelie finally agrees to seek treatment for his addiction.
Eric Cartman	203	Poor and Stupid	He doesn't think he can become a NASCAR driver.
Eric Cartman	204	It's a Jersey Thing	He got pushed into a tree by Kyle.
Snooki	204	It's a Jersey Thing	She got insulted and punched by Kyle.
Eric Cartman	204	It's a Jersey Thing	Snooki raped him.
Wendy Testaburger	205	Insheeption	She thinks Stan has a hoarding disorder.
Sharon Marsh	209	Crème Fraiche	She feels unwanted by Randy as he is getting sexual gratification from cooking.
Jamie Oliver	209	Crème Fraiche	He thinks school cafeteria food should be healthy but no one listens to him.
Eric Cartman	210	HUMANCENTiPAD	His mom didn't get him an iPad.
Eric Cartman	210	HUMANCENTiPAD	He gets struck by lightning.
Ike Broflovski Various Canadians	212	Royal Pudding	The Princess of Canada has been kidnapped.
Geddy Lee	212	Royal Pudding	Alex Lifeson shoots himself in the head during Rush's performance.
Mr. Mackey	212	Royal Pudding	He tells Kyle that his father was killed by Tooth Decay.
Harrison Yates Mr. Mackey	212	Royal Pudding	Tooth Decay is killed.
Crack Babies	214	Crack Baby Athletic Association	They are abandoned, unloved, and addicted to crack.
Kyle Broflovski Nurse	214	Crack Baby Athletic Association	They feel sad about the crack babies' situation.
Linda Stotch Stephen Stotch	215	City Sushi	They think Butters has Multiple Personality Disorder when he pretends to be a truck driver.
Stan Marsh	217	Ass Burgers	He tries to explain his situation of being depressed to Mr. Mackey.
Jenny Simons	219	Bass to Mouth	She crapped her pants.
Larry Feegan	220	Broadway Bro Down	He is afraid to jump off the diving board.
Shelly Marsh	220	Broadway Bro Down	Larry drowned.
Eric Cartman	221	1%	The 99% started "ganging up on him".
Eric Cartman	221	1%	Clyde Frog was murdered.
Eric Cartman	221	1%	Peter Panda was murdered.
Eric Cartman	221	1%	Rumpertumskin was murdered.
Eric Cartman	221	1%	He is about to kill Polly Prissypants.
Karen McCormick	223	The Poor Kid	Her dad and brother are fighting.
Karen McCormick	223	The Poor Kid	She and her siblings have been taken away from their parents who were arrested.
Eric Cartman	223	The Poor Kid	His mom is "poor".
Karen McCormick	223	The Poor Kid	She and her siblings have been taken away to the foster home.
Mr. Adams	223	The Poor Kid	He finds out the kids he sent to the foster home were being tortured.
Eric Cartman	226	Faith Hilling	Coming to terms with the fact that Faith Hilling is really outdated.
Eric Cartman	227	Jewpacabra	He can't break free from being chained as bait for the supposed Jewpacabra.
Egyptian Woman	227	Jewpacabra	Her child gets killed by God in Cartman's dream.
Pharaoh of Egypt	227	Jewpacabra	Cartman (who is his son in the dream) gets killed by God in Cartman's dream.
Mr. Mackey	228	Butterballs	He is harassed by Bucky Bailey.
Stan Marsh	228	Butterballs	He is harassed by Bucky Bailey.
Bucky Bailey	228	Butterballs	He is harassed by Nick Jabs.
Nick Jabs	228	Butterballs	He is harassed by Jesus.
Stan Marsh Kyle Broflovski Eric Cartman	229	I Should Have Never Gone Ziplining	Stan got Kenny killed.
Eric Cartman	230	Cartman Finds Love	He feels happy that Nichole and Token got together (he set them up without their knowledge).
Eric Cartman	230	Cartman Finds Love	He is upset that Nichole and Token broke up.
Ike Broflovski	233	Insecurity	He thinks his mom slept with the UPS man.
Linda Stotch	234	Going Native	She doesn't want Butters to go back to Hawaii.
Butters Stotch	234	Going Native	He isn't allowed on the plane to Hawaii.
Ike Broflovski	237	Obama Wins!	Obama won the election.
Eric Cartman	238	Let Go, Let Gov	The NSA doesn't think he's "cool"
Aaron Hagen	239	Informative Murder Porn	His father murdered his mom.
Butters Stotch	239	Informative Murder Porn	His father murdered his mother in Minecraft.
Kyle Broflovski	243	Ginger Cow	He is being blackmailed by Cartman.
Butters Stotch	247	The Hobbit	Wendy called Kim Kardashian a hobbit.
Kanye West	247	The Hobbit	He tells Wendy the story of how Photoshop transformed his fiancee, the hobbit.
Wendy Testaburger	247	The Hobbit	She gives into peer pressure to Photoshop herself.
Shelly Marsh	256	#REHASH	She is disgusted by Lorde's performance at the Pepsi Center.
Eric Cartman	262	Safe Space	He is harassed online.
Bebe Stevens	269	Skank Hunt	Heidi quits social media.
Eric Cartman	278	White People Renovating Houses	Heidi "went off" on him.
Multiple students	279	Put It Down	They mourn Gary Borkovec's death.
Marcus Preston	282	Hummels & Heroin	Reminded about how much he loved Chuck-E-Cheese.
Eric Cartman	284	Doubling Down	He wants to get back together with Heidi.
Eric Cartman	284	Doubling Down	Heidi broke up with him; Token slammed the door in his face.
Sharon Marsh	288	Dead Kids	She feels hysterical about the school shootings.
Randy Marsh	288	Dead Kids	His wife keeps on getting angry and yelling at him about the school shootings.
Strong Woman	290	The Problem with a Poo	She is pregnant with PC Principal's children.
PC Babies	290	The Problem with a Poo	They get upset over anything not politically correct.
PC Principal	290	The Problem with a Poo	The PC Babies are the most PC he has ever seen.
Kyle Broflovski	290	The Problem with a Poo	He is at his wit's end with Mr. Hankey, explaining that if he helps him any more South Park with erase him too.
PC Principal	290	The Problem with a Poo	He cannot let the PC Babies know that he is their father.
Man	292	The Scoots	The phone signal has been cut off.
Kyle Broflovski Eric Cartman	294	Nobody Got Cereal?	Manbearpig killed Satan.
PC Babies	295	Buddha Box	They get upset over anything not politically correct.
Sheila Broflovski Jimmy Valmer Mrs. Testaburger	296	Unfulfilled	They are unfulfilled; without their Amazon orders.
Linda Stotch	296	Unfulfilled	Her family has been downgraded from Amazon Prime to Amazon USDA Choice.
Stephen Stotch	296	Unfulfilled	He feels desperate about the Amazon workers' strike as his family needs the membership and prays for a solution.
Stephen Stotch Mr. Zewiski	296	Unfulfilled	Their sons are in the Bike Parade, which is affected by the Amazon workers' strike.
Ike Broflovski	298	Mexican Joker	His family is taken away and separated by ICE agents.
Chinese Prisoner	299	Band in China	He is sentenced to another 10 years in prison and cannot go home.
Stan Marsh	299	Band in China	His death metal band is never going to make money so he cannot move away from Tegridy Farms.
Liane Cartman	300	Shots	Eric cannot stay at South Park Elementary if he does not get vaccinated.
Randy Marsh	300	Shots	Everyone, including his family, is pissed off at the way he runs Tegridy Farms.
Danny Ray Johnson Unnamed girl	300	Shots	They are forcibly vaccinated at the CDC Child Immunization Challenge.
Randy Marsh	302	Tegridy Farms Halloween Special	Shelly destroyed his Halloween Special.
Mrs. White	303	Season Finale	Her son was killed.
Eric Cartman	304	Board Girls	He begs Mr. Mackey to keep girls out of the Dice Studz Board Gamers Club because they make the boys look stupid.
Heather Swanson	304	Board Girls	PC Principal shoved him.
Stan Marsh	305	Turd Burglars	He fake cries to pretend that Kenny is dying.