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Kyle Schwartz is Kyle Broflovski's maternal cousin from Connecticut. He has heavy breathing, due to asthma. He also has poor eyesight, for which he has large glasses that are for prescription and likely farsightedness, due to the magnification of his eyes. He has a lot of health issues including asthma, allergies and many more. He made his first appearance in the Season Five episode, "The Entity".

Background[]

While his mother is in the hospital, Kyle stays with the Broflovski family during the events of "The Entity". He is a stereotypical American Jewish kid (with characteristics such as hypochondria, poor athleticism and being good with money), unlike Kyle, who is worried about his anti-Semitic friend Cartman, whom he fears will constantly make fun of him. Kyle then offers Cartman forty dollars not to make fun of Kyle Schwartz. Cartman initially tries to comply with the agreement, but later makes a concentration camp joke in class, blowing the deal.

Kyle Schwartz then states that Kyle (Broflovski) should have tried to get away with paying Cartman $12.50, instead of $40. Angered by his ingratitude and personal quirks, the boys help Kyle try to get rid of him. They put him on a sled tied to a bus headed for Connecticut, and later seal him in a box and place him on a plane to Antarctica. He nevertheless keeps returning to the Broflovski home. In the end, his mother's condition improves, and he decides to go home after receiving $5,000,000 from an investment bailout to the airlines. The boys suddenly see their opportunity and try to convince him to stay, but Kyle Schwartz replies by saying that he couldn't stand how everyone in South Park is a stereotypical hillbilly jock redneck.

Kyle also appears in "Red Sleigh Down", where he calculates how many presents Cartman will get for Christmas, concluding that he will still owe two presents even if he finds a cure for cancer and AIDS before Christmas, and "The Losing Edge", where the boys play on the South Park Little League Baseball Team and have to get the worst person they can find to play because they do not want to qualify for a national tournament.

Talents[]

Kyle Schwartz is very good with investing and other matters concerning money. He states that one day he would like to be an investment banker. He is cautious and avoids trouble—this may be the reason he keeps returning after all the times the boys try to send him away.

Appearance[]

Kyle's upper lip is pulled above his teeth and his brown "Jewfro" is parted in the middle. He wears a dark pink jacket with blue triangles across it, and light green pants. His eyes are shown to be green when his glasses are on, and they appear as black dots when they are off. He is somewhat overweight, with a larger body profile compared to most other kids and has a nerd stereotypical voice, seen by his outfits and particularly in South Park: The Fractured But Whole, where his stomach is shown protruding from his costume. In "The Entity", he has stated that he has lumps on the dorsal part of his hands.

Personality[]

Kyle is seen to be a stereotypical Jew who can handle money well, he commonly talks about his health issues all the time, has agoraphobia, fear of heights (as stated by him in From Dusk till Casa Bonita), and is generally overly cautious. He also seems to have a hatred towards bactine namely due to him getting eczema from the lidocaine when it gets on his fingers.

Video Games[]

South Park: The Fractured But Whole[]

HumanKite2

Human Kite's intro at the first encounter.

Kyle first appears during the mission Alternate Universes Collide, where The New Kid meets Human Kite in his (Kyle Broflovski's) room, who is annoyed by his cousin wanting to be Human Kite as well. The player has to fight against Human Kite 2, only to discover that he shows no fear to cheat, e.g. giving himself an extra turn or healing his health 100%. After a few turns, Alternate Human Kite attempts to do a special attack, which results in him jumping off Human Kite's bed and lying on the floor, granting the player victory by default.

In Alternate Universes Collide Again, Human Kite calls The New Kid for help due to Alternate Human Kite returning. The player encounters Kyle Schwartz in the Broflovski's backyard, and is ordered by Human Kite to fight against the Alternate version of him another time. When his health goes down to 1, he tries to use his Hebrew faith to "call upon the power of the wind", which results in his kite flying away and getting stuck in a tree. He then summons his "super weapon" by crying out for Sheila. Sheila then joins the fight against The New Kid and his allies. After being defeated, she threatens to call the police on The New Kid and the others, but Kyle stops her admitting that this was all his fault, saying that he was just sick and tired of his cousin always copying him, and being a superhero is about saving lives, not Judaism. He then is told by his mom to let his cousin play with him and the others. The mission ends after Human Kite and The New Kid giving Alternate Human Kite his kite back by getting onto the tree via Fartkour.

After this mission, Cousin Kyle occasionally appears on the battlefield during fights (e.g. in The Samaritan Agenda), interrupting the regular game, doing one action and immediately leaving afterwards. The New Kid and their allies are obviously pissed, recognizable due to their facial expressions.

In The Many Asses of Dr. Mephesto, the player has to fight a giant, genetically mutated version of the Alternate Human Kite, who becomes vulnerable for a limited time when The New Kid uses their TimeFart Shift, causing the day-night-circle to speed up. After some time he cheats again and gives himself one turn after one single turn of the player and the allies. The mutant is defeated by a big fart of the player.

He also helps the player in the DLC level From Dusk till Casa Bonita. At first, he is seen in his own Human Kite costume while having dinner alongside the actual Human Kite, who is eating dinner at Casa Bonita with Gerald and Sheila Broflovski, and him too. Also, after the player crashes Mike Makowski's birthday party and you continue to pursue him and Karen McCormick, you have to do a Fartkour minigame to pass through the level. However, instead of the regular Human Kite helping you up, he will boost you up instead.

South Park: Phone Destroyer[]

Alternate Human Kite is a 3-Cost Rare Ranged unit of the Superheroes theme that sees Kyle as his own Human Kite persona in South Park: The Fractured but Whole. When he uses his Charge skill, he will push all enemies away from him with a blow of wind.

Prominence[]

Trivia[]

  • His voice is based on Tony Curtis's impression of Cary Grant in the movie Some Like It Hot. Tony Curtis's real name was Bernard Schwartz, which may explain Kyle's surname.
  • The name Juan Schwartz is also a pseudonym used by Trey Parker[2] early in his career in the credits to the horror musical Cannibal: The Musical. It is unknown if Kyle's last name was influenced by this.
  • His need to eat fish instead of beef at dinner in "The Entity" was based on radio talk show host Dennis Prager who is also Jewish and wears glasses. The inspiration came after Trey and Matt had previously worked with Prager on the short film, For Goodness Sake II, where he would constantly ask his assistant to bring him fish for lunch.

References[]

Broflovski / Schwartz Family

Cleo Broflovski | Gerald Broflovski | Ike Broflovski | Kyle Broflovski | Kyle Schwartz | Murrey Broflovski | Sheila Broflovski | Kyle's Elephant

South Park families

Main characters' families
Broflovski Family | Cartman Family | Marsh Family | McCormick Family

Other characters' families
Adams-Makowski Family | Barbrady Family | Biggle Family | Black Family | Burch Family | Charlotte's Family | Cotswolds Family | Daniels Family | Donovan Family | Garrison Family | Gray Family | Gueermo Family | Hakeem Family | Hankey Family | Harrison Family | Mackey Family | Malkinson Family | Mephesto Family | Nelly's Family | Red's Family | Rodriguez Family | Stevens Family | Stotch Family | Tenorman Family | Testaburger Family | Tucker Family | Turner Family | Tweak Family | Valmer Family | White Family


Minor Characters from Season Five
The Afghan Boys | Barbara Garthunk | Buddha | Carrie Quinn Dolan | Cher and Sonny Bono | David Blaine | Donald Trump | Drew Carey | Dr. Larry | Ed Sullivan | Enrique Iglesias | Excalibur Barker | Excalibur Sorcerer | Fleetwood Mac | Frank Fun | Gary Condit | Geldon | George W. Bush | Gloria Allred | GS-401 | IRS Agents | Jack Tenorman | Jada Pinkett Smith | John and Patricia Ramsey | The Knights of Standards and Practices | Kobe Bryant | Krishna | Kyle Schwartz | Lao Tse | Laura Bush | Madonna | Mr. Farnickle | Mr. Grazier | Mrs. Farnickle | Mrs. Tenorman | Muhammad | O.J. Simpson | Old Farmer | Osama bin Laden | Predator | Radiohead | Sam, David, and Chris | Scott and Tyler | Seaman | Snoop Dogg | Some Puerto Rican Guy | Stephen and Martha Thompson | Steven | Super Best Friends | Ted | Will Smith | Zytar

More information: List of Minor Characters from Season Five | Season Five

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