South Park Archives

"Japanese Toilet"
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Episode no. Season 26
Episode 03
Production no. 2603
Original airdate March 1, 2023
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"Japanese Toilet" is the third episode of Season Twenty-Six, and the 318th overall episode of South Park. It aired on March 1, 2023.[1]


South Park learns about the wonders of Japanese toilets.[1]


SPW pic -- Spoiler Spoiler warning!
Plot details follow.

At Tegridy Farms, Randy Marsh is sitting on the couch playing video games with his children nearby when Sharon tells him the toilet in the guest bathroom is broken. Randy takes a look at it but is unable to fix it. Sharon suggests buying a new one but Randy denies they could get rid of' "Ol' Blue". Sharon threatens to stop helping him sell weed if he doesn't cooperate. At Home Depot the next day, Randy is looking at toilets when a salesman mentions Japanese toilets, cautioning they are expensive. Randy insists he isn't poor and wants to see them, and the salesman leads Randy to a special boutique with its own staff. The Japanese toilets for sale all include a bidet, seat warmers, BlueTooth capability, and mood music, with the salesman expressing that the bidet cleans far better than toilet paper. Randy takes a "test drive" and makes sounds of delight as he tries it for the first time, agreeing to purchase it. Randy holds a family meeting and tells Sharon, Stan and Shelley that due to the weed business they have nice things and shouldn't be ashamed of them, comparing them to the Kennedy family, before the deliverymen arrive with the new toilet. Sharon asks about the cost an Randy admits it cost ten thousand dollars. Sharon demands he return it until Randy convinces her to try it for herself, and Randy listens to her letting out squeals of delight as it activates and helps clean her.

The next morning at South Park Elementary school, Clyde Donovan, Meagan Ridley, and Eric Cartman are among the children who make negative remarks to Stan, calling him "rich" and ignoring him. Jimmy approaches Stan and cautions him not to rub people's noses in it, and explans that Randy called much of the town to brag about the ten thousand dollar toilet. At home, Randy has a very large brunch with Nelson, Mrs. Broflovski, Stephen and Linda Stotch, and Richard and Mrs. Tweak, who make small talk discussing the recent drought before Stephen excuses himself to the bathroom. Randy begins talking up the toilet and narrating the toilet's features to his guests when Stan comes home and confronts him, asking him to stop bragging and accusing him of acting like a jerk. Randy compares himself to "JFK" a a wealthy, respected person trying to change things and help people, and chiding Stan to change his attitude.

Later, Randy receives a visit from his proctologist, Dr. Sheltair, who is concerned about Randy's hemorrhoids after not seeing him in his office for a couple days, and hope to take his wife on a trip to Tuscany. Randy mentions the toilet and tells the doctor he will no longer need his services. He offers the proctologist to view the toiler, but instead of calm, happy sounds, the proctologist begins shouting and kicking the toilet, declaring he hates it and that it has ruined Tuscany. Randy kicks him out of the house, realizing how much money the protcoclogist has made off his ass prevously. Stan finishes at school and Butters Stotch follows him out and jokes about a 'plungercost', teasing Stan it doesn't cost nothing for him due to his wealth, and Jimmy again warns Stan not to brag about the toilet. They go for a walk in the park and Jimmy points out toilet paper is ineffective and seventy percent of the world still uses soap and water, claiming the average American uses 140 rolls of toilet paper and that a million acres of forest are cleared for toilet paper use, and warns Stan nobody wants to change their toilet paper.

At City Hall, Mayor McDaniels intoduces Randy S. Marsh for a public service announcement. Randy declares there are cheaper Japanese toilets available and that the investment is worthwhile for the money saved on hemmorhoid cream and toilet paper. When he declares that toilet paper is not needed, he is shot by an unknown assailant. At the hospital, a doctor reports Randy is in critical condition and nobody knows who shot him, that he is in a coma blathering 'nonsense'. Stan feels guilty and apologizes for yelling at him, promising to go out and pick up where he left off. He talks to Detective Yates, who lets him know they are taking this seriously. Officer Johnson approaches and lets him know a proctologist has walked into Home Depot with a gun. Yates encourages him to continue, mistaking it for a joke, before Johnson explains the proctologist refuses to take the fall for the shooting, and Yates realize it is real. The police show up at Home Depot and Dr. Sheltair is armed and threatening to harm the Japanese toilet salespeople and delivery men, denying he shot Randy and claiming he'll be the scapegoat, claiming 'they' would silence him with their lawyers like they did the second grader who wrote a story about toilets in the school paper two years ago, then Sheltair shoots himself in the ass.

Stan realizes the second grader in question was Jimmy and confronts him, insisting he needs to know who shot his dad. Jimmy admits to writing the story and insists 'they' took everything from him - his bike, his cat, and that 'they' were going to sue his parents, and Stan realizes it's the toilet paper companies. Jimmy summarizes the same facts from earlier, claiming toilet paper is ineffective and unclean, but the industry is worth billions and too powerful, including Proctor&Gamble, Georgia-Pacific, and Kimberly-Clark. Stan realizes his father was correct, that he wanted to change things and was shot for it. Jimmy advises Stan not to proceed, but Stan promises to confront the issue, holding a rally at City Hall to discuss toilet paper alternatives when Randy, still recovering, interrupts and apologizes, insisting that South Park has nothing against toilet paper. Stan tries to talk him out of it but Randy reminds him he was shot and then asks the town to apologize to the toilet paper companies. Stan asks about helping people and leading by example as Randy said before, but Randy tells him they aren't the goddamn Kennedys after all.

Randy digs up the Ol' Blue from where it was buried in the yard and then replaces it in the bathroom, observing that when you have a luxury item and compare it with what else you have, it makes you feel you need additional upgrades, so it is better to stick with the old, crappy things one has. He immediately follows this by telling Sharon he loves her and kissing her on the cheek, to her offense.



  2603: "Japanese Toilet" EDIT
Story Elements

Randy MarshStan Marsh • "Days of Blues"


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South Park: The Complete Twenty-Sixth Season