South Park Archives

"I Swear" was featured in the Season Sixteen episode, "Cartman Finds Love". The ballad was originally recorded by country singer John Michael Montgomery. It was later covered by the boy band All-4-One. Eric Cartman adds additional lyrics.


The song is performed twice in the episode; first, after Token Black and Nichole are freed from the school gymnasium, a montage begins, with Cartman and his imaginary Cupid Me singing this song to themselves.

Cartman sings the song for a second time in a bold attempt to ruin Kyle Broflovski's date with Nichole, in order for her to get back together with Token. Cartman crashes the Pepsi Center Arena in Denver, Colorado during the start of the Denver Nuggets vs. LA Clippers basketball game. After taking control of the Megatron screen above the arena, Cartman diverts everyone's attention by performing a modified version of this song with Brad Paisley. In this modified version, he professes his love for Kyle.


First version:
I see the questions in your eyes.
I know what's weighing on your mind.
You can be sure I know, my heart.
Girl I'll stand beside you through the years
You'll only cry those happy tears
And though I make mistakes, I'll never break your heart
I swear by the moon and the stars in the sky
I'll be there
I swear (I swear) like a shadow that's by your side (Keep it down, girl)
I'll be there
For better or worse (better or worse), till death do us part (death do us part)
I'll love you with every black beat of my heart
And I swear. I swear. I s-we-e-e-ear Yeah, I swear. Straight up. What it do?

Second version:
I want to hold you every morning and love you every night, Kyle. I promise you nothing but love and happiness.
I swear by the moon and the stars in the sky
I'll be there, Kyle
I swear, like a shadow that's by your side
Kyle, swear to God I'll be there.
For better or worse

Brad Paisley:
Better or worse, till death do us part, death do us part
Cartman and Brad:
I'll love you with every gay beat of my heart!


  • The real match between the Denver Nuggets vs. LA Clippers took place on April 18, 2012. The Nuggets lost: 104–98.
  • The song "I Swear" was covered by R&B vocal group All-4-One in 1994. This version has become the most popular rendition of this song.

Songs from Season Sixteen
Ballad of James Cameron | Gangnam Style | Gonna Fly Now | Here Comes Fatty Doo Doo | I Love Sarcastaball | I Swear | Jesus Loves Me | Little Green Frog | Make Bullying Kill Itself | Maniac | Our Love Grows | San Diego | The Imperial March | The Jewelry Polka | The Only Memeing I'll Ever Do | The Star-Spangled Banner

See also: List of Songs | List of Minor Characters from Season Sixteen | Season Sixteen