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Diane Choksondik was a fourth-grade elementary teacher who was first introduced in the Season Four episode "Fourth Grade". Her name is a play on the phrase, "chokes on dick". She was the fourth-grade teacher at South Park Elementary until her death in "The Simpsons Already Did It" (her death was spoiled in the previous episode). After her death, her role as a 4th grade teacher was soon passed on to Mr. Garrison.

Background[]

In "Fourth Grade", Ms. Choksondik is first introduced as the school's new fourth grade teacher, the same year the boys are scheduled to attend the fourth grade. The boys and their classmates initially plan to collectively moon her to assert dominance, but she proves intimidating, leading all but Eric Cartman to back out of the ruse.

She complains to the school staff that her children are undisciplined, but they are horrified by her appearance. She asks to speak to their previous teacher, but they inform her that Mr. Garrison is living somewhere out in the mountains as a result of his denial of his homosexuality.

She nonetheless seeks Garrison out and he trains her and advises her on how to deal with the children, while coming to terms with his own sexuality. She returns to the school and uses what she has learned, advising the boys to "present them" when they tell her to suck their balls, just as Garrison suggested.

Death[]

The episode "Professor Chaos" ended on a cliffhanger (though it was revealed in the same episode) saying someone would die, in a parody of cliffhanger endings. It was revealed during this gag that Ms. Choksondik had died. In the following episode, "The Simpsons Already Did It", the boys had put some of their Sea People, brine shrimp, in her coffee as a joke.

They went to find their Sea People, to avoid getting caught, and Cartman hid inside her cadaver to avoid being discovered by the mortuary staff. It was revealed in this episode when the boys were watching the news that Mr. Mackey's semen was found in her stomach, but that did not contribute to her death.

Although her exact cause of death is not specified, it can be assumed from the circumstances that either she, true to her name, choked to death on Mr. Mackey’s penis, or the Sea People combined with Mr. Mackey's semen and the resulting Sea People society self-destructed and killed her from the inside out.

After this incident, the students in Ms. Choksondik's class were given two weeks off school until Mr. Mackey taught for a short period. In the episode "The Death Camp of Tolerance", Mr. Garrison reprised his role as their teacher and remained teacher ever since. (Although he was fired in "Where My Country Gone?, but he returned to teaching in "South ParQ Vaccination Special").

Appearance[]

77a

Mrs. Choksondik on South Park Studios.

Ms. Choksondik is well known for her distinctive appearance; she has extremely exaggerated saggy breasts, is overweight, and her right eye is lazy, causing it to drift downwards or wobble around as she talks. She also does not wear a bra, so when she lifts her arm up, her shirt stretches going up with it revealing her nipples. She also wears large glasses and was made fun of in high school because of them.

Her outfit consists of a long red V-necked top with white cuffs and a white trim on the hem, and a calf-length blue skirt that is possibly made of denim. She keeps her hair in a loose ponytail held in place with a large white hair-tie and small golden loop earrings. She has a side fringe, which is usually tucked behind her left ear (in fact, the only time it is seen loose is in "Proper Condom Use" when she is having sex with Mr. Mackey). Also in "Proper Condom Use", she is shown to be wearing large purple underpants with a frilly hem (the outline of which shows through her skirt when she bends down). She has plain black shoes and appears to be wearing white socks or tights, but when Mr. Mackey removes her clothes during "Proper Condom Use" it appears that she is not wearing anything on her feet. However, this may be a continuity error.

Interactions[]

Mr. Mackey[]

Ms. Choksondik had a sexual relationship with Mr. Mackey, the school counselor in "Proper Condom Use", when the two characters realize that they are attracted to each other while discussing sex education. Mr. Mackey refers to a sexual experience at a much younger age as his only one, despite having been married in "Ike's Wee Wee" while on drugs and having many instances with Liane Cartman. He could have forgotten about this event though Ms. Choksondik confessed to being a virgin until then (the likely instance of the sexual experience that Mackey was referring to was his rape by Woodsy Owl).

Trivia[]

  • Ms. Choksondik is from Denver.
  • In an apparent play on the way children sometimes make fun of their teachers' names, the boys usually miss the obvious joke of Ms. Choksondik's unusual surname, calling her Ms. Makes-Me-Sick ("Fourth Grade") or Ms. Chokes-On-Rocks ("How to Eat with Your Butt"). However, in "The Death Camp of Tolerance", they laughed at her name, implying that they might have finally gotten the joke.
  • In "Fourth Grade" she was followed by kittens trying to obtain milk from her huge, sagging breasts.
  • Ms. Choksondik was a virgin until "Proper Condom Use".
  • She is left-handed, as shown every time she writes on the chalkboard in class. This makes her one of the two known left-handed teachers in South Park Elementary (the other being Mr. Garrison.)
  • In the Japanese language dub of the series, Ms. Choksondik is voiced by Kenji Nomura.
  • In "Fourth Grade" you can see her breasts while talking to Principal Victoria, Mr. Mackey, and Chef. All three were disgusted by it.
  • A photograph of Ms. Choksondik can be seen in South Park: The Stick of Truth. Located in the "Hall of Honor" at the school.
  • Ms. Choksondik had a speaking role in 13 episodes before she was killed off.

Prominence[]

Video Games[]

South Park: The Stick of Truth[]

Diane's picture is seen on the "Hall of Honor" along with deceased faculty members and students.

South Park: The Fractured But Whole[]

As with the previous game, Diane's photograph is present in the Hall of Honor, although this time it is not explorable.

References[]

South Park Elementary staff
Coach Miles | Girls' Volleyball Coach | Herbert Garrison | Mitchell | Mr. Derp | Mr. Garrett | Mr. Harris | Mr. Mackey | Mr. Meryl | Mr. Thompson | Mr. Wyland | Mrs. Streibel | Ms. Bronski | PC Principal | Pearl | Recess Supervisor | Richard Adler | Strong Woman | Substitute Teacher | Unnamed Bus Driver
Former
Diane Choksondik | Jerome "Chef" McElroy | Jose Venezuela | Margaret Nelson | Miss Claridge | Mr. Conners | Mr. Slave | Ms. Ellen | Ms. Stevenson | Nurse Gollum | Principal Victoria | Randy Marsh | Veronica Crabtree
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