Cable ACE Awards 1997

The 19th Annual Cable ACE Awards 1997 was a South Park short created for the CableACE Awards of 1997.

Background

Eric Cartman, Stan Marsh, Kyle Broflovski, and Kenny McCormick are special presenters for the "The Best Talk Show Series" award. The nominees were:

Charles Grodin: The Charles Grodin Show, CNBC.
James Lipton: Inside The Actors Studio, Bravo Cable Network.
Various NBC News Commentators: InterNight, MSNBC
Larry King: Larry King Live, CNN.
Bill Maher: Politically Incorrect, Comedy Central.

Throughout the presentation, the boys complain about the cheapness of the ACE awards during the previous non-televised night, by saying it was general admission, they had to pack their own dinners, and the prize for winning best animation series was a 5 Dollar gift certificate to Roscoe's House of Chicken and Waffles . Kenny reads the winning nominee in a muffled voice which was translated by Stan as Inside The Actors Studio Bravo Cable Network. They all clap at the end and nothing bad happens to Kenny.

Trivia

This was the last year of the Cable Ace Awards.

Images

Script

Cast

Stan Marsh
Kyle Broflovski
Eric Cartman
Kenny McCormick

Cable ACE Awards 1997

	A stage. Sela Ward is speaking
Sela Ward	Here are Stan, Kyle, Cartman [cheers and applause rise up from the audience] and the most eloquent of them all, Kenny. [looks off to her left. Cut to a construction-paper stage. Stan and Cartman enter from screen left, Kyle and Kenny from screen right. They line up abreast behind a little podium]
Stan	Whoa, dude! Sela Ward is hot!
Kyle	Yeah!
Kenny	(Yeah, I'd pinch her to get in trouble) [the others laugh]
Stan	Yeah. I would, too.
Kyle	Tonight, we are here to present the award for Best Talk Show Series.
Cartman	Ey! Wait a minute!
Kyle	What?!
Cartman	This doesn't look anything like last night's Cable Ace Awards! Everything's all fancy!
Stan	That's because we were on last night, Cartman, when they did the non-televised awards for little, unimportant shows like ours.
Cartman	What do you mean?! Why were we on last night?!
Stan	Dude, it was the same as tonight, except that we had general-admission seating, and had to pack our own dinners.
Kyle	Yeah. And instead of an actual award, people received a $5 gift certificate at Roscoe's Chicken and Waffles.
Cartman	That sucks! Who's in charge here?!
Stan	Anyway, the nominees for Best Talk Show series are-
Cartman	No! Everybody, just? hold on a minute!
Stan	Will you shut your fat mouth for five seconds, Cartman, so we can do this?!
Cartman	No way!
Kyle	Shut up, Cartman!
Stan	Anyway, the Best Talk Show nominees are?
Kyle	[displays a picture of the first nominee] Charles Grodin, CNBC.
Cartman	[displays a picture of the second nominee] Inside the Actors Studio, Bravo Cable Network.
Stan	[displays a picture of the third nominee] Internight, MSNBC.
Cartman	[displays a picture of the fourth nominee] Larry King Live, CNN.
Kyle	[displays a picture of the fifth nominee] And Politically Incorrect with Bill Maher, on Comedy-ee Cen-tral.
Cartman	Mmeh!
Stan	And the winner is?
Kyle	Now, remember: there are no losers at the Cable Ace Awards, only people who are less likely to have another season.
Stan	Yeah. [the audience laughs] And the winner is?
Kenny	[opens an envelope] (Inside the Actors Studio, Bravo Cable Network.)
Stan	Oohhhh, huh, [he and Kyle start clapping] heh-heh-heh-hehh. [Cartman starts clapping]
Kyle	Congratulations.
Cartman	Yes. Very nice, very nice.
Stan	[steps forward] Oh. He said the winner is Inside the Actors Studio, Bravo Cable Network.
End of Cable ACE Awards 1997

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