Clubhouses/Script



Cast Stan Kyle Cartman Kenny Wendy Bebe Clyde Swanson Kevin Fosse Randy and Sharon Marsh Liane Cartman Mr. Mackey Chef Roy, Sharon's new boyfriend Fifth Graders Runaway Girls Terrance and Phillip Fat Abbot and Friends


 * Not Complete*

[A familiar intro plays, a playground scene. Bill plays catch with anotheir kid, Jordan and the black kid are on swings, and Pip is on a hobby elephant. Stan is hiding behind a tree, using his mitted hand as a gun] Stan: Sgt. Stanley Marsh is trapped behind enemy lines. His only chance of survival is to sneak past the Bosnian guard who stands watch. [Cartman, patroling the invisible boundary] Sgt. Marsh knows it's now or never. He must make a run for it. [waits for Cartman, with wooden toy rifle, to pass, then rushes past him] American base is only a few feet away. Cartman: [turns right and notices Stan, then] Master thief, halt! [they fire away at each other. From behind a nearby bush, Kyle and Kenny pop up and fire at Cartman] It will take more than your weak American weapons to destroy me! Stan: Cartman, we shot your Bosnian fat ass! Kyle: Yeah! You're dead! Cartman: I have Class 4 armor on, that, uh, ih-ih- Stan: No, you don't! Cartman: -special armor, that's impenetrable to American bullets. Kyle: Dude! Every time we play Americans vs. Bosnians, you cheat! Stan: Yeah, Cartman, you suck! If you want to play Americans vs. Bosnians any more, you can just play with yourself! [he and Kyle leave] Cartman: That's fine! I'd like playing with myself! I'll play with myself all day long! [Kenny laughs and Cartman looks at him] What?