Le Petit Tourette

"Le Petit Tourette" is the eighth episode of Season Eleven, and the 161st overall episode of South Park. It aired on October 3, 2007.

Synopsis
Cartman discovers the joys of Tourette's syndrome, and Kyle tries to stop his evil plan.

Plot
While at a toy store, Cartman encounters a boy named Thomas who has Tourette's syndrome. After learning about the disease, he bounds off in joy, singing "(I've Got a) Golden Ticket", implying that he will fake Tourette's just to get away with it. The next day, Ms. Cartman takes him to the doctor, believing he has Tourette's. Cartman innocently explains that the school staff will not understand what is wrong, but the doctor assures him the school will be informed.

The next day, Cartman walks through school, swearing at Wendy and an unnamed ginger boy. Kyle warns him that Principal Victoria is nearby, but Cartman greets and insults her as well, leading her to greet him with no problem. As Kyle questions that Cartman swore at the principal, Butters explains that Cartman has Tourette's syndrome, with Craig adding how lucky the latter is, adding that if he could say what Cartman says he would be "so happy". Cartman then explains to everyone he can't control it, and Principal Victoria explains they all understand, but Kyle says he's faking. Cartman takes Kyle to one side and explains to him that he missed the previous day's assembly, which explains Cartman's supposed disease. Kyle tells him that he doesn't have it, and Cartman sarcastically claps, congratulating Kyle on his realization. Cartman explains how brilliant it is, and that Kyle can go tell everyone how he's faking, but Kyle ignores and walks on. Cartman continues his false tirade by greeting Mr. Mackey, then spewing vulgarities at him.

In the classroom, Ms. Garrison cannot tolerate Cartman, who is being too distracting. As she goes to Principal Victoria about this, the latter introduces Mr. Donaldson from the Tourette's Tolerance and Understanding Foundation, who has come to teach about the disease. At that moment, Kyle enters pursued by Cartman who is frantically apologizing. Kyle explains Cartman is making his disease up, but Mr. Donaldson is extremely angered at this, as he, too, has Tourette's, and dubs Kyle a bully. Kyle is taken to the Children's Therapy Center where Mr. Donaldson runs a group which includes Thomas. The children explain about Tourette's and that it isn't fun. Kyle, after not knowing how to explain how only Cartman was faking, apologizes. Outside, Kyle, accompanied by his parents, is forced to apologize to Cartman. Kyle reluctantly does so, and Cartman heads off happily.

Meanwhile on Dateline Chris Hansen announces he has received a letter from a "brave little boy with Tourette's" (Cartman) who wants them to film him. At Cartman's house, Kyle enters and is angry at Cartman who plans to use his television appearance to say horrible things about the Jews. Cartman refuses to stop and Kyle vows to stop him. Cartman asks Kyle if he has any idea how liberating it is to say whatever comes to mind without restriction, but suddenly (and accidentally) says he wet his bed last night.

At Whistlin' Willy's, everyone congratulates Cartman for his bravery, and that he will go on national television as the spokesperson for Tourette's, which worries Thomas. Cartman then blurts out things such as he's making the whole thing up and that he cries at night because he doesn't have a dad. After slipping up about his crush on Patty Nelson, he dashes to the bathroom. He realizes that he's said whatever he wants so long without thinking about it that he can no longer control what he says - he could now actually pass for having Tourettes. He asks Butters what he should do, passing it off as his cousin who is experiencing this, but then says that he and cousin "touched wieners". He then dashes out the building in complete embarrassment.

Cartman then visits Hansen and explains that he won't be doing the show because his grandmother died, but afterwards dismissively blurts out that she's fine. Hansen informs him that when a he was tracking a pedophile during To Catch a Predator, the pedophile got away. Dateline eventually found him, but the pedophile proceeded to commit suicide. Hansen explains threateningly that he hopes Cartman will not have to be tracked down only to find him committing suicide in the same manner. Before the show, Cartman discovers he will be on in five minutes. He prays to God begging for a miracle.

Outside the studio, Kyle and Thomas concoct a plan. Thomas welcomes pedophiles into the studio, pretending it is their home. As they are in the studio, they recognize Hansen and upon realizing that they are on Dateline, commit suicide (although one commits suicide only after learning that there were no brownies). The audience flee the studio, terrified, followed by Hansen, who Thomas blurts obscenities at. Craig calls Thomas the luckiest boy in the world, and asks him if he'd like to hang out some time.

In the studio, Kyle tells Cartman he is beaten and won't be going on television - Cartman hugs Kyle, to his surprise, and thanks him, explaining how he's been saved and that he will now get help. As he skips off singing "(I've Got a) Golden Ticket", Kyle and Thomas simultaneously say "Aw, shit!".