User blog comment:Matteso586/Matteso586 Episode Ideas/@comment-4417828-20120606143304

The story you have written brings back to many past topics and jokes. Athough this works with fan fiction, I have done it myself, this would be considered a bad idea if you are trying to emulate the series. This story has an overused premise, the time-stop watch thing, sounds like an episode of the old Twilight Zone and other typical scifi. The jokes are reused from older episodes, creating good jokes is difficult, I know. Your characters do not resemble the ones in the show because you have them doing things that are out of their personality range. You have written a pretty good story but you missed the point of the characters you are attempting to write about.