User blog comment:HighJewElfKing/Holiday Special Thoughts and Reaction/@comment-4436827-20170930214408

To answer the question about why Randy wanted to taint his DNA results; It's to make him seem like he has some DNA of an oppressed group of people(like the parody commercial says with some of the testimonials). And spoiler alert, it is shown with the 2nd DNA test that he had a small amount of Neanderthal DNA. As for why he hates Columbus Day, my guess is he still has the 'PC indoctrination" ingrained in his mind.