Loving the Football

"Love the Football" was a song sung by Jerome "Chef" McElroy in the Season One episode, "Big Gay Al's Big Gay Boat Ride".

Background
While explaining to the team the way to properly handle a football, Chef inevitably begins a monologue in the style of a sensual soul ballad. He treats the ball as if it were a living woman and forgets about his role as the coach.

Lyrics
Chef: Now children, we've got to handle the ball better. You got to hold your football like you hold your lover. Gently, yet firmly. You wanna be both nurturing and clinging at the same time. Oh yeah! Just like makin' sweet love to the football. Feelin' naughty with the football. Mmmm.