Tom's Rhinoplasty

 This article refers to an episode called Tom's Rhinoplasty, for the place of the same name see Tom's Rhinoplasty (Place)

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"Tom's Rhinoplasty"' is the 11th episode of Comedy Central's series South Park''. It originally aired February 11, 1998.

Plot
In this episode, Wendy awaits as an opportunity to spend time with her boyfriend, Stan. However, when their teacher Mr. Garrison goes to get a rhinoplasty, a new substitute named Ms. Ellen comes, and all the boys in class find themselves inexplicably enamored with her, including Stan, making Wendy incredibly jealous.

Mr. Garrison's nose job works out well, and he soon finds himself the most attractive man in South Park (looking like David Hasselhoff). This in mind, he decides to quit teaching and spend his time "hanging out and screwing hot chicks." Ms. Ellen is hired as the class' permanent teacher. The boys by this time are actively trying to court her, but Chef (having beaten them in their attempts of courtship) warns them she is a lesbian. Unsure what that is, the boys try to become lesbians themselves, in order to woo Ms. Ellen's heart.

Wendy's attempts to ruin Ms. Ellen or make herself more noticeable to Stan all fail. But then, inexplicably, a bunch of Iraqi men burst into the classroom during a session, and declare that Ms. Ellen is actually an Iraqi fugitive; they take her into custody and shoot her into the center of the sun via a rocket. Concurrently, a large group of women rampages the streets in search for Mr. Garrison. Mr. Garrison, frightened by all the attention and horny women, decides to return to his normal looks. Wendy is therefore able to reclaim Stan as her boyfriend.

At the end of the episode, as Kyle is questioning the unusual end of Ms. Ellen, Wendy speaks with the Iraqi men in fluent Arabic and pays them with a huge amount of American money. She also thanks Mrs. Kimball (one of the women from the group of women that chased Garrison) for helping her. Wendy, slightly deranged, admits she was behind the plot, proving that even the smartest little eight-year-old in South Park is more psychotic than most serial killers.

Goofs

 * When the boys are in the lunchroom, you can see a boy sitting at a table resembling Craig but with green clothes.
 * Near the end, Cartman is eating the box so that he can become a lesbian. However, Ms. Ellen was already arrested.
 * When the children see the new look of Mr. Garrison, Wendy is wearing her normal outfit.
 * When Wendy is yelling Stan, Francis is seen having similar hair as Kevin has. A minute before, he was sitting with his normal haircut.
 * According to the Iraqi soldiers who burst in on Ms. Ellen's class, she's had an affair Saddam Hussein, then the president of Iraq. It's interesting to note that Saddam is depicted in the full South Park style. This differs from future appearances where his physique is in the style of Terrance and Phillip characters and use an animated photograph of his head.

Pop-Culture/Historical References

 * The voice of Ms. Ellen was done by actress Natasha Henstridge. Who at the time was most famous for her appearance in the 1995 film Species. During the opening credits for this episode she is billed as a guest star in the episode, however instead of Henstridge's name she's credited as "The Chick From Species".
 * When Mr. Garrison has plastic surgery done on his face, he ultimately chooses a face that resembles actor David Hasselhoff. Instead of creating a South Park-esque head of Hasselhoff, they chose to animate a photo of the actors head. The plot of Garrison getting the Hasselhoff face is a parody of Knight Rider, a TV series which starred Hasselhoff. In the show, his character Michael Knight was shot and had to get plastic surgery done on his face.
 * When Chef is trying to gauge how attractive Ms. Ellen is, he offers the following female celebrities as basis of comparison: Actress Vanessa Williams, R&B Singer Toni Braxton, actress/model/former Playmate Pamela Anderson, and actress Erin Grey. In the case of Grey, Chef specifies how she appeared in the second season of Buck Rogers in the 25th Century, the TV series which she is most famous for appearing in.
 * The music during Wendy's sad montage is sung by actress Courtney Ford. The montage also uses clips from previous episodes "Cartman Gets an Anal Probe" and "Pink Eye." A piano rendition of this song originally plays in the unaired pilot when Kyle begs the Visitors for Ike back.
 * According to Cartman, instead of teaching the children their multiplication table, Mr. Garrison was educating them on the thrilling subject of actress Yasmine Bleeth's romance life. Bleeth was best known for her role on the TV show Baywatch. According to Garrison, she dated actor Richard Grieco who is best known for his role as Detective Dennis Booker on the TV series 21 Jump Street. Garrison had also told the children that Grieco was on that show.
 * The mere mention of the 1997 sci-fi film Contact causes Mr. Garrison to become violently ill. The film stars Jodie Foster playing the role of Ellie Arroway, who is trying to contact aliens. The film ends with her meeting an alien which takes on the form of her father. Garrison slams the movie for having such a bad ending. Matt Stone and Trey Parker share this opinion towards the film and this is the first of many critiques of the film to appear in an episode of South Park.
 * Wendy asks Ms. Ellen if people her age require Depends undergarment. These adult diapers for incontinence were invented in 1980 by Kimberly Clark. The common stereotype associated to the product is that they are worn by the elderly who have no control over their waste functions.
 * Stan mishears Chef explaining that Ms. Ellen is a lesbian. The word he hears is plebeian. The historical use of the word was to classify the general population of ancient Rome. In modern times it's used as a derogatory term for those considered to be common or ignorant.
 * Whenever Mr. Garrison struts his stuff, the song "Shadow Dancing" plays. The song was sung by Andy Gibb it was released on an album of the same name in 1978.
 * According to Cartman's mother, to be a lesbian you need to listen to the Indigo Girls, the boys mispronounce the name as "Indiglo Girls", Indeglo is a illumination technology for wrist-watches that is owned by the Timex watch company.
 * Also according to Cartman's mother, a lesbian also wears Birkenstocks.
 * The Indigo Girl's song that they boys play is called "Make it Easier" from their 1989 album Strange Fire.
 * When Wendy is made over by Bebe, Cartman thinks she looks like Olivia Newton-John as she appeared in her role of Sandy Olsen in the 1978 film version of the musical Grease. However, he confuses Olivia Newton-John's with singer Elton John.
 * When Mr. Garrison is posing for pictures at the Photo Dojo, a production still from Cannibal! The Musical, which was Parker's first film. It was released by Troma Entertainment in 1996.
 * Mr. Garrison decides that if he's going to be able to pose for more pictures, he's going to need more Smack. Smack is the street name for the drug Heroin. Drug abuse is a cliché of the modeling industry.

Kenny's Death
When the Iraqis arrest Ms. Ellen, she grabs a scimitar off one of them. She quickly loses her grip on it and it flies away, impaling Kenny between the eyes and pinning him to the wall.

Quotes
Wendy: I told her. [Eyes go into concentric circles] Don't… fuck… with Wendy… Testaburger!

 Cartman: My mom told me to be a lesbian you have to lick carpet.

 [Cartman takes a bite out of a cardboard box]

Cartman: My mom said to be a lesbian you have to chow down on this box.

 Mr. Garrison: I feel kinda nauseous.

Tom: Yes? Well, that's to be expected. We did some major reconstruction, sawed through some bone, snapped some cartilage…

Mr. Garrison: Ugh.

Tom: … all the blood and mucus just the sound of bone and sinew coming apart. [makes disgusting noises of bone and blood]

Mr. Garrison: Uuuuuggghhh!

Tom: By the way, did you ever see that movie Contact? [Mr. Garrison throws up.]

Mr. Garrison: Oh, stop, that movie was terrible!

Tom: I'm sorry, Mr. Garrison. Why don't you get some rest and I'll check on you a little later.

Mr. Garrison: Sat through that entire movie to see the alien and it was her goddamned father!

 Cartman: My grandma's Dutch-Irish and my grandpa's Lesbian, that makes me quarter lesbian!

 Mr. Garrison: I'm going to do what I've always wanted to do: hang out and screw hot chicks.